Cool Shit 8/29

Clearing up the shit out there about PCP. In my research for adding this link (yes, I do research) I found the slang terms for PCP, in case during your Labor Day weekend you need a pick me up...

Angel Dust
Amoeba
Amp
Belladonna
Animal Trank
Zoom
Peace Pills
Boat
Sherm Sticks
Super Grass
STP
Embalming fluid

I wonder if hijinks ensue in the funeral home when the mortician's assistant happens to be a street-wise teenager and is asked for more embalming fluid. My guess is yes.

I so want this to be a completely true story, with no sarcasm or trolling. I don't want to find out later that Mr. Sheen was on drugs, or that he was just fucking around with the media. I want him to be honest to goodness hunting for a half-man half otter creature in Alaska. Please.

Slow motion in a movie can really punctuate a moment. But I'm not sure these are the ten "Best" uses of it. Of course, our source here is Esquire, so...

Yesterday, I gave you a glimpse of the upcoming Oscar season. Today, I offer you a glimpse of the upcoming music releases for the Fall.

Speaking of yesterday, here's part two of the Action Park legend...


The Most Insane Amusement Park Ever - Part 2 of 2 by insane-amusement-park

Big news for Luther fans...apparently it's being turned into a movie. Although, apparently it's going to be a prequel which, well - I've never been a big prequel fan. A prequel feels as though they force things in to make things you've already seen make more sense, in places where it doesn't really matter. Anyway, if you have never even heard of Luther, it's a British (BBC) television series starring Idris Elba as a London detective. The first two seasons are streaming right now. You should watch it just to see Elba's natural British accent, which will only make you more amazed at his Wire performance.

Cool Shit 8/29

Sigh...I never got to Action Park as a child, and that makes me sad. It seems the perfect place to test the boundaries of childhood - just enough danger to get yourself in trouble, in a place your parents are willingly allowing you to go. Sadly it is no more and nothing will pop up in its place. I do know a kid who's mom made a name for herself suing Action Park on behalf of children being grievously injured there. She called it Traction Park.

I'm excited for the movie Gravity, the latest movie from Alfonso Cuaron. Though he isn't a household name (at least in normal households), he's the guy who made Children of Men, a criminally underrated movie everyone should watch. I know I've posted it before, but here's the trailer for Gravity. Reviews so far seem to be positive.



Maybe if we spent less time bickering about politics, and more time devising intricate pranks like this one out of Japan, we'd be better off. This ain't no Dick Clark Ed McMahon joint.



Summer's almost over, and you know what that means...we're entering Oscar season! Get ready for the prestigious, pretentious movie train to roll in!

This whole Batman/Superman movie/story/thing has been in the news lately because people are ENRAGED at the choices made so far about it. And honestly, I can't think of anything to get more ENRAGED about, so please continue Internet. To help fuel your fire, here's a look at a 2002 script for the movie. Now, I haven't read it, but that doesn't mean I'm not an expert on it. And so I can assure you, it's terrible. Enjoy the rage it will create in you.

Cool Shit 8/28

Normally I wouldn't post a trailer like Getaway because I don't want to be part of the marketing machine for such a generic, cliche-ridden film with actors looking to make a quick paycheck (I'm looking at you Ethan Hawke.

HOWEVER...

I have few rules in my life. But the ones I do have, I tend to take seriously. For example, one of my rules is "No movie with Michael Caine in it can be considered bad." It's just the way it is. And another one of my rules?

Any movie that directly or indirectly reminds me of the 1997 classic Anaconda is worth at least one viewing...



If we all agree to pretend that Jon Voight was not swallowed - and then spit back up - by an anaconda in the amazonian jungles, and that he survived and went on to build a crime syndicate in LA (or whatever city Getaway is staged in), changed his accent SLIGHTLY from Paraguayan? to Russian? in order to fuck around with Ethan Hawke, I think we can all say it will make Getaway that much better.

Also, including that trailer, gives me great reason to include this. You're welcome...



You'd think a story about a man mistakenly sleeping (not fucking you sickos) with a fox, thinking it was his girlfriend would be unbelievable. But I'm here to tell you why it is believable. Because I have a better fox story. A few years ago, late at night, a fox broke into my parents house (and by break in, i mean it smashed through a glass pane by the door; it did not use lock picks) and went and hid behind a chair. My mother, startled by the noise went to investigate. Thinking it was the neighbors dog (I have no idea) she simply pet it and went to bed.

Big mistake.

Waking up in the morning to the aroma of fox scat and a mangy fox, she did what any normal person would do. Told my brother and father there was a loose fox in the house and that she was going to play tennis.

The moral of this story? It takes more than a psychotic, mangy fox in the house to get a rise out of my mother.

2 minutes and 18 seconds of airplane porn. When you sit back and start to think about how a plane even works, it is rather crazy that we take it all for granted. It was just a little over 100 years ago since we discovered flight!



More video game minutiae...this time we're taking a look at video game urban legends.

The US Open (for tennis) is this week (and next). I'm not sure what your interest is for this, but Nadal's incredible shot below, might be the shot of the tournament, and it happened in the first round!



I'm not even sure how to include this link. There's a group of people on the internet that believe there is a Bigfoot inside Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas, a 2004 video game. But it's very hard to find, and the "evidence" of its existence mirrors the evidence of the existence of an actual Bigfoot in real life. I find myself thinking more and more of a snake eating itself as I read the article.

Cool Shit 8/27

There a number of authors out there whom people read simply to say they've read them, without necessarily understanding why. Thomas Pynchon is probably at the top of that list. Here's a scattered look at his relatively hermitic life.

You might want to check your attic (or your basement, I don't know where you store things) to see if you have any of these old video games. They could score you lots of money.

Not only do trains still exist, but there are some trips that are actually enjoyable.

I want to believe that the Arrested Development movie will be awesome. I want to believe it. But I'm no longer sure I can.

So you're surfing through your Instagram one night...one lonely, lonely night, and you're like, "hey, I wonder what crazy, innocent pictures #bigbootyhoe would bring up for me to look at and do nothing else." Well sir (or madam, I don't judge), you're fresh out of luck, because Instagram bans tags such as #bigbootyhoe. And I for one, am just a little disappointed. Want to know what else they ban? Take a look.

I do enjoy that the Economist, in this article about how to buy drugs online, does employe the line: "Getting a hold of drugs has never been all that easy."

Obviously, the Economist has never been to an ultimate game. Or a high school.

I'm not even sure how I stumbled across this, but if you're looking for a soundtrack for your day, you could do worse than this album of music made to sound like music from an unproduced Mexican Western.

Cool Shit 8/26

Let's start Monday off on a good note: Check out these crazy images of different places all over Earth - from space.

Special effects wizards choosing their favorite special effects from movies.

Hack your life! These helpful tips will make your life easier in certain situations. Finally! An easy way to get a single Tic Tac!

I love the Hammer. So this Bob Hammelin baseball card is awesome to me. But I can understand how some people might suggest it's the worst of all time. Not for nothing, this is my favorite baseball card of all time...

More treasure hunts! Some of these have been found. Some of them are likely hoaxes. And then there are some that still have never been found! So go get one of these and get crackin'!

Stories from SNL cast members about their auditions and how weird Lorne Michaels is during the whole scenario.

The VMAs were last night. Missed them like me? Here's a quick high/low guide to what happened. I didn't read it either. 

Cool Shit 8/22

Confessions of a serial killer. And he's from Sweden, so you know he's especially fucked up.

If you were/are a big Cheers fan, you will enjoy these facts about the show.

Here's a quick look at what's in demand for the rich in China. I, too would enjoy a gold car.

The novelist Elmore Leonard passed away a few days ago. Among other talents, he was especially good at writing opening lines. Here are all of them.

Be thankful you live in modern times, or you might be rubbing day old sour cream over yourself as a remedy for chapped skin.

Those bands you listen to weren't always named that. My favorite old band name? The Polka Tulk Blues Band. Think that would have had the same success as Black Sabbath?

The moral of this story is, don't get on the bad side of a Mexican drug cartel.

Cool Shit 8/21

Things happen at Walmart. Weird things.

While these inventions/technologies may look like they're right out of a science fiction novel, they're all too real and all too taking over the world.

Everyone is out trying to make a buck off you. And don't think it stops when you die.

So yeah, there's allegedly such a thing as a water sommelier at a place in Los Angeles. And even though they offer many "classy" waters, I'm willing to bet even he couldn't tell the difference between waters if given a blind taste test. But here, if you're so inclined, you can check out the water menu here.

Hack your body and make yourself feel better. Sometimes.

Ever wonder what happens when you win the Price is Right?

Cool Shit 8/20

While it's hard not to enjoy a list of good facial hair, Esquire does its best to buck the trend. Some good ones on here, but it also relies too much on gimmick facial hair (Hulk Hogan?) and not enough on the awesomeness of the 70s - when facial hair wasn't just an artistic statement, it was a way of life.

Profile on Peter Berg, director of Lone Survivor, coming out this fall.

This article explains how Prometheus was a missed opportunity to be a masterpiece. While I respect that the author has an opinion, I can't say I agree. To be a masterpiece, a movie needs to have a clear vision and follow through, neither of which Prometheus had. In fact, I would argue by even being indirectly linked to the Alien franchise, Prometheus damaged the masterpiece status of some of those films. And I don't want to hear about how "executives" came in and muddied the water. Because even Alien 3, David Fincher's attempt, which was not good, still had an idea behind it that was executed. Prometheus made no sense in certain instances, and was edited horribly and had no character with any redeeming value. I could write 12,000 more words about it, but I'll stop here.

Dolly Parton, outside the country music world (and bosom fanatics world), probably doesn't get the respect she deserves. Jolene is an awesome song. Not familiar with it?



And now, if you're so inclined, listen to it slowed down, which gives it a weird, yet very cool alternative perspective...



Have a desire to go to Burning Man but just haven't made the trip? This might be your next best solution:



You know the old adage: sharks make movies better.

Cool Shit 8/19

I'm not a Family Guy fan, so I'm not well versed in some of their more classic bits, such as the chicken fight. That said, this real-life re-creation seems pretty cool.




So, maybe I'm buying into the Hyperloop hype like everyone else by continuing to add links about it, but not because I think the Hyperloop is a great invention or anything. I doubt it's existence would affect me in the least. But I do treasure innovation and thinking that breaks through the conventional mold of what currently exists. And that's what Elon Musk has been doing consistently. So enjoy an animation of the Hyperloop...



I loved Missile Command as a kid and played it relentlessly. Here's a history of the game.

I remember when Voyagers' 1 & 2 launched, and while I didn't completely grasp the enormity of the concept that they would one day leave our solar system, I still thought it was cool that they would simply keep transmitting data back to Earth as long as they could, and that these two probes could do so much in the nether regions of space. While the Voyager missions don't seem to get a lot of credit, to me, they seem to be one of the most important space projects Earth has ever achieved.

Had you ever found yourself freshly employed at Wendy's in the 80s, you most likely would have seen this training video. And then, I don't know...?



Wikipedia is obviously a great place to get some quick, broad knowledge on just about anything. And the minutia that it sometimes displays will lead to some head scratching, yet brilliant lines of copy.

A cool look at Alfred Hitchcock movies, broken down in charts.

Cool Shit 8/16

So the United States apparently has finally acknowledged that Area 51 exists.

There are some blogs out there that are very niche. You may enjoy one or two of them.

Dave Chappelle is back doing stand-up. I'm not sure he isn't still tortured, but it seems he's still funny.

10 objects that have hazy origins, in which their finders can then proclaim them to be alien. I particularly enjoy the Raul Julia's son story. Unrelated, Raul Julia was fantastic in Presumed Innocent.

Harrison Ford sure likes to point angrily at stuff...Also, hey Harrison, maybe don't slouch so much?



The Gathering of the Juggalos is an annual event celebrated by many. But I like to celebrate the annual "Journalist goes to the Gathering of the Juggalos and reports back what he sees" event just as much.

Cool Shit 8/15

Ramp. Bicycle. Lake. Film:



Enjoy sushi? Take these helpful tips and enjoy it more!

Quite possibly the greatest thing on the internet...the fake movies of Seinfield, posterized!

Speaking of Seinfeld, here's a recent profile about him where he delves into his life and his standup.

Like superheroes? I mean do you really like them? Because if so, here's a chart detailing them and the superpowers that make them up.

Cool Shit 8/14

What is a gaffer? Is the Best Boy really better than all the other boys? Find out what they mean and all the other job responsibilities that are listed in a movie's credits with this cheeky short film...



So this story is completely creepy...apparently someone broke into the apartment of Famke Jannsen and left a creepy children's book next to her bed?

A bunch of maps that will answer some questions you might have about humanity.

Want to know the synopsis for Christopher Nolan's next project, Interstellar? Me too. Because this link basically says, "It's about space."

Who do you think the best thinker is? Well, you're most likely wrong, as this chart will attest. I think. It's pretty confusing.

Ever in a metropolitan area and see a pair of sneakers hanging from the wires above you, and wonder what that was all about? Well, here's a short documentary on the subject.

Cool Shit 8/13

So how do drinks get served in Antarctica? By a bartender, silly.

The 80s were a weird time. Look at all these television stars who thought they could sing! And only Bruno could pull it off. (The hubris shown in this video is absolutely off the charts.)



Want to see a chart showing us all the potentially dangerous asteroid orbits to Earth. Actually, you might not want to. Ever have Spirograph as a kid?

Elon Musk finally explains his Hyperloop in some detail. And then says he's too busy. I want to know about the projects that are keeping him away from the Hyperloop!

Not sure why I have to take years of World history in school when this handy chart exists.

Insanely rich? Have access to a boat? Enjoy a stay on an abandoned sea fort!

The moral of this story? Don't get caught in Mexico doing anything illegal. Because then you might get thrown in a Mexican jail.

Cool Shit 8/12

Sure, sometimes the satire of the Onion hits a little too close to home, but it should never be taken seriously. Or for real news.

Tech predictions re an uncertain business.

Oh, Elon Musk, you so crazy!

I did not believe I was going to wake up this morning and find footage of Jerry Lewis' infamous The Day the Clown Cried!



Another cool time lapse for you all to enjoy - this one of New York city.

Cool Shit 8/9

A simple story about 4 guys who tried to row across the Atlantic Ocean.

Seems like you might not have to figure out to survive as much as you first thought when the zombie apocalypse arrives.

Trailer for the new movie Monuments Men, about a group of guys going around and getting art. Starring George Clooney and Matt Damon. Seriously, they couldn't call it Ocean's 6? The Dirty 1/2 Dozen?



Anytime you need a refresher on the real, true power on Earth, take a look at these destructive, nature photos.

Speaking of photography, some of these perfectly time photos have been seen before, some have to be fake (the UN soldier I simply won't ever believe) and some are just really cool.

If you ever found yourself asking why Crispin Glover wasn't involved in Back to the Future II, this article is for you.

Cool Shit 8/8

There's a new Spike Jonze movie out. In typical fashion, it's a bit bizarre.



And speaking of movies, here's a trailer for The Counselor, which boasts an all-star cast, and quite possibly America's best living novelist as it's screenwriter...



I think Tara Reid is suggesting she USED to think whales and sharks mated to spawn whalesharks, and not that she currently thinks that's how it happens. Or something. I do enjoy that she starts the whole thing off with "I don't want to sound stupid..."



I could spend hours in a Barnes and Noble, so I can only imagine how much time I would want to spend in bookstores like these.

Yeah, that's right. Escape from L.A. was set in 2013. Let's see just how different/similar it is/was.

An interview with Mike Doughty, formerly of Soul Coughing. His story is a strange, sad, and potentially redemptive one (when it comes to his back catalog at least) as he hated his time in Soul Coughing and refused to play that music. Until now.

Don't know Soul Coughing? Enjoy...

Cool Shit 8/7

So obviously Taco Bells sees potentially increased profit by offering a breakfast menu. The problem is, tacos really don't translate to the breakfast palate. Until now!

Keeping with the fast food theme, foreign McDonalds have the best offerings.

Looks like there's a new Ricky Gervais series (well I think it was on in England) that Netflix will carry exclusively. As Gervais series have seemingly trended downward, I'm not sure about this one, but it does feature Karl Pilkington in a supporting role, lending more credence to the theory that he's not stupid but a brilliant Andy Kaufman-type performer.



There are a lot of pastas out there!

If you're a music lover, you'll enjoy this list of places you should visit.

Telepathy as a weapon! At least that's what some people in Turkey are purporting. Somewhere David Cronenberg is talking to his lawyers.

Cool Shit 8/6

Check out the stories behind these classic album covers. Don't know what an album is? Invent a time machine and go back to the crazy nineties to check out how all us old folk had to listen to music!

You may think this is some sort of crazy animation or even claymation, but it's neither. It's real-mation!



Sure shampoo seems like a silly little thing you can take from a hotel room, but just how far are you willing to steal?

For the people that want to offer their guests a heart attack when they step into their bathroom.

Who doesn't want to be a cat burglar? Learn how to pick locks with ease and you'll be on your way.

Beer Labels in Motion gives you exactly what the title suggests. And it's cool.

Cool Shit 8/5

If you think too long about these paradoxes, you're going to hurt your brain.

A time lapse video, this time in a weird little California town that has giant metal sculptures of things and a light pollution ordinance, allowing you to see the stars clearly...



And here's another time lapse video, this one of 408 hot air balloons taking off at the same time...



Have an itch to go treasure hunting? Here are 10 you could start off with.

If you have 190 million dollars lying around then you could own the country's most expensive house.

Cool Shit 8/2

Your morning mind bender: trying to define the concept of infinity.

I will never get tired of old Soul Train dance clips set to modern music. It's where I get all my wardrobe ideas from...



Neutral Milk Hotel has decided to add some more dates and hold a real tour. This is exciting!

Trailer for David O. Russell's latest: American Hustle.



Martin Scorsese lists his 10 favorite movies, and they're exactly what you'd expect.

So something fell from the sky, and then the military swooped in and now no one knows what's going on.

Commentary from the World Chess Championship Candidates Tournament.