Cool Shit 1/13

New show called Turn, about spies in the American Revolutionary War, coming this April on AMC:



Finally! We've broken the wimpy 16 story height and gone ahead and built a 17 story tall water slide...



A couple rumors about the new Star Wars movie. And I'm going to say, I agree with Abrams here, focusing on the characters we know, and giving fans a kind of tribute to them before he goes off with new characters. I think it's a smart strategy. Now, if only we can make sure he isn't the primary writer, I think this has the potential to really work.

Now, if Abrams hired this guy to oversee the look and feel of the film, maybe we'd really have something. It is possible of course that Abrams is thinking of things a little bigger than using Legos.

And one more Star Wars link - this one is from the Peter Mayhew, aka Chewbacca, photo collection: pictures on the sets of Star Wars that you've never seen before.

Oh good, Quentin Tarantino is making another western. On the positive side, it won't take much to be better than Django Unchained.

Cool Shit 11/18

What is the fascination with this show? The first few episodes of season 1 were decent, but it went to poop after that. And now it's coming back for a 4th season? What pictures does Veena Sud hold?

Meanwhile AMC is going in the opposite direction, looking for fare that will push the boundaries. Preacher is definitely that show. While this news suggests it will get made, I wouldn't hold your breath. This comic book series has a long history of almost getting made. If you're unfamiliar with the comic book, here's a quick summary of what it offers.

Everything you knew about eating apples is wrong.

There are so many awesome things going on with this video of The Bar Kays performing "Soul Finger," the best possibly being with nothing plugged in, the entire band is simply pantomiming the performance...



It used to be just the simple mention of the word "shark"would be enough to keep people out of the ocean. But now I think I would take an army of sharks over this squid type creature they have found in the Gulf of Mexico.

A down economy means black market food items. Here's a look at recent thefts of hauls. Of course, I have no idea where one would pick up black market nutella, but if you have a source, I'm all ears!

Thelonius Monk. Paris. 1969. Listen.

The Killing: Days 14 & 15

Like all of you at the end of last year’s final episode of The Killing, I wanted to strangle a plant. Led down a path that suggested we would know who killed Rosie Larsen by season’s end, instead we were given nothing but a pile of red herrings – and I don’t even like fish. In a nutshell, (and from my shoddy memory) we had to deal with:

Richmond, an idealistic mayoral candidate revealing a startling dark side involving underage hookups

Richmond then being shot by Belko Royce, a friend of the Larsens who also has a criminal past and a wee bit of instability

Detective Holder’s redemptive arc throughout the season destroyed in the last 30 seconds to get a cheap thrill out of the audience, planting evidence to suggest the creep Richmond, while still a creep, might not be the murderer.

Linden getting yet another excuse not to go to California.

(I think the last one was the worst, simply because the California plotline dragged everything it touched down to the ground completely, with no rhyme or reason to exist. Seriously, why did this murder investigation need the back drop of Linden potentially moving to California? Also, it set it up so early in the season that we knew she was never going to go – she was the star of the series! It offered no dramatic tension whatsoever.

It was all of those reasons, and many more (the terrorism angle one episode had! The teacher who didn’t kill Rosie Larsen but was involved in immigrant smuggling, but then got beat up and wait where is he now? The Larsen’s grief that played out in real time on the show! Etc.) that made me so frustrated with the show. Gone was the eerie suspense the pilot episode created; in its place came a combination of an average Law and Order episode (pick anyone sans Jerry Orbach) a bad Choose Your Own Adventure Novel (not the Bigfoot one though).

But, in the end, I decided to come back to The Killing’s universe…some because I’ve invested enough of my time to want to see how they’re going to piece together a storyline that leads to Rosie Larsen’s killer, but mostly because my choice for the killer is suddenly back in play. Yes, that’s right I have been given a stay of execution to continue harping on Tom Drexler as being the killer! Obviously last year, when we all thought the season finale would give us closure on the murder investigation, it wasn’t looking good for Tom being the big bad guy, since he was on screen for a total of about 12 seconds. But now that we have another entire season to play around with and sculpt a trail right to his basketball court, I can’t see any reason not to list him as the prime suspect. At least until next week, when he’s shot.

…but I just couldn’t recap the 2 hour premiere (which was really just two episodes played back to back. Oh sure, I watched, and dutifully took notes, but in the end when I sat down to write, I realized I couldn’t get into it. It was taking too long to go into too much detail about stuff that was too boring and not important. Because what has happened is they have completely backed themselves into a corner, introducing the conspiracy angle. We now have 12 more episodes to trod through to get to the answer, and knowing that, we also can assume the first 6 episodes are designed to throw us off the track of finding out who the real murderer is. And knowing that doesn’t make me feel like writing too much about it. So instead of the all too in-depth recaps I normally throw out there, I’m going to layout some stray observations/feelings/throughts about the first two hours. After that, I’ll reassess my state of mind and see what I’m up for…

DAYS 14 & 15

Richmond.

He’s in the hospital, paralyzed. We have been led to believe both that he did it, and then didn’t do it. Of course, now that he’s been cleared of Rosie’s murder (because he was going to commit suicide to honor his wife or something) I now have to ask what his value is to the show? Why should I care about his character? I just want to know who killed Rosie, and now that he’s apparently off the list of suspects, I don’t care about his plight. Yes, I understand that peripherally, he’s still involved, now that we know his opponent, the current mayor had at least something to do in framing him (something that is so stupid, since to be framed, they had to know about his hooker history, and seriously, wouldn’t leaking that be enough to ruin him?) so I guess he’ll be along for the wheelchair ride to close up that plotline. But other than that, the guy is a creep (remember, he’s been visiting hookers and asking if they know what it’s like to drown) but not enough of a creep to murder a hooker.

Sigh.

The Conspiracy.

It’s good at least that we know one of the moving parts behind it (the current mayor). Of course, I’m sure that’s not the really big moving piece behind it. But I’m also willing to bet there will come a point during the show where we find out the mayor (and his cronies) simply took advantage of the situation of Rosie’s murder, and didn’t actually have her killed. I realize this doesn’t make too much sense right now (since Rosie’s body was found in a campaign car of Richmond) but if it simply comes out that this was a convoluted plot by the mayor to win the election, well…it’s stupid. The other stuff that is stupid: How deep this conspiracy goes…meaning it seems the entire Seattle police department is in on it, save like 3 people. And I have no idea what to make of the new lieutenant. Is he there to keep the conspiracy going? Is he there to clean up a corrupt police force? Is he good or bad? All of his actions are mired in a stew of ambiguity and ambivalence.

The Larsens.

Mitch isn’t there, so now we get to watch domestic life with Stan and Terry, Mitch’s sister. It’s not all that different, unfortunately. Oh and I almost forgot, remember when Stan was arrested and all that? Yeah, neither do the writers. Rosie’s backpack shows up and Stan is all “Yikes!” at least enough to get his old crew back in the picture (which I’m sure will go smoothly) and badmouth the cops…oh and get Belko killed. Yeah, that’s right. Belko commits suicide after talking to Stan. Presumably (and this is me presuming, but I could be way off base) because he was looking for Stan’s approval of shooting Richmond and taking the law into his own hands. Only Stan doesn’t give him the approval he’s looking for. So he shoots himself. Which pushes Stan down the road of taking the law into his own hands. The logic has the twists and turns of a pretzel. A gross, sewer laden pretzel. That was left out in the rain.

Linden.

I’m shocked she didn’t go to California!

I’m also shocked at some of the decisions she is currently making. Mostly to do with her son. I’m counting down the episodes to when she finally just ships Jack off to his father’s so we can be rid of this boring, do nothing plotline. It has to be coming soon, right? Please tell me.

Anyhoo, Linden sorta kinda bullies her way back on the case with the new lieutenant by the show’s end, which yeah, I didn’t get it either. But there’s a lot I don’t get with this show, and by this point I’m just following along trying to figure out if it will start making sense again soon. So Linden is back in Seattle, for good, trying to solve a case and also find a place for Jack to hang out, that’s not a hotel room. Along the way she peels away a couple layers of the conspiracy onion (great band name suggestion – thank me in the liner notes please) and figures out that Holder’s sponsor, Gil Sloane, has at least something to do with framing Richmond. Of course, in the process, we realize the onion has many many layers, as while she is surreptitiously following Gil Sloane meet up with the mayor’s advisor at the waterfront construction area, she is being surreptitiously followed and photographed. By who we have no idea.

Holder

Holder is the small fish who thinks he’s big. And his bowl is about to get a lot smaller. I’m glad to see he’s not really a big part of the conspiracy, only a pawn that is being moved around on the conspiracy chessboard. Because, while it would have been a ballsy move to make him be more involved, it also would have cheated the audience out of the satisfaction we got from his redemptive arc last season. Holder is currently the most interesting thing The Killing has going for it, and to destroy that for a cheap thrill would have been lousy.

Still, we have to wade through some pretty awful stuff to get where we are right now. While Holder knew the picture was doctored, he also thought it was just a nail that was needed to ensure the real killer was caught. Also, he wanted a promotion. But now there are pieces that aren’t adding up, and he’s starting to question his role in the whole thing. Unfortunately for him, that’s not how things are supposed to work. First, his lieutenant turns on him. Then, his sponsor turns on him. But the final straw comes when Linden turns on him. Holder’s always in a state of fragility, and this realization that he has screwed up isn’t going to help his psyche.

So there you have it. A mish mash of nothing that has pretty much caught us up on the murder investigation (or lack thereof) that has introduced a conspiracy that at the moment, seems like it’s being run by the current mayor to ensure a victory and get his waterfront property deal through. Of course, I suspect there will be one or two other reveals to suggest he is nothing more than a minor player in the whole thing and that Rosie’s killer is not who we think it is right now. Unless you think it’s Tom Drexler. Because that’s who I think it is. And it’s obvious that a bigger player has to be involved since the conspiracy runs deep.

The Walking Dead: Pretty Much Dead Already

Well, we finally got an answer to the "Where the fuck is Sophia in the land of zombies?"

And it was a doozy.

I've obviously criticized this show a bunch, so I don't want to go much further in praising the conclusion of this plot. The final scenes of this episode did a lot, both viscerally and symbolically.

But let's hold off on that for a bit...

We know (or I've stated at least) how inconsistent season 1 is. After the great premiere, it dipped into boring character development and cliches before ramping up a bit with the CDC. The ending immediately gave us fear and hope, and gave season 2 at least a destination (Fort Benning).

Unfortunately, season 2 followed the same trend. Good premiere (though I had problems with it, the payoff with Sophia was at least unexpected so I'll give back some points I took away) followed by a slow down as new characters were introduced and then had to be developed. Aside from a couple of truly harrowing moments (everything at the school, and...well, maybe you can insert your own harrowing moment in here), we have been on the same trail as season 1, right down to the barn zombies being the CDC (in thematic devices, not actual locations and conflicts).

Yet while the CDC set the survivors off on a specific mission, the resolution of the barn zombies simply created a completely new set of rules for the world they now live in, making for a much more interesting journey (hopefully).

So I'm very happy to say that I am excited for the season to pick back up in February. I absolutely assume we will still get the same problematic approach we've seen in the first two seasons, but this episode felt like a game changer. It looks like the survivors have turned the corner on "hope," and might have to simply look for "survival." Sides have been picked, and you could argue that morality is the underdog.

But let's take a closer look...

Glen tells the survivors about the barn zombies (quick aside - doesn't "barn zombies" sound so much better than "walkers in the barn?") with predictable results. the survivors, who have been out in the real world and know the dangers this implies, rightfully get a little agitated with their hosts. And yet Rick wants to be a little more diplomatic, since you know, he's going to be a dad again. And that makes sense. The farm hasn't been attacked since they've been there, and it seems it could be defended fairly well (I guess - I mean it has a fence and everything), so while I don't think he's in love with the idea of the barn zombies, he has other stuff to think about. Being a leader is tough, I tell you!

So yeah, obviously Rick has to have a talking to with Herschel. And that goes as you might expect. Herschel, bible in hand, is casting Rick and co. out and sticking to his guns, even after the pregnancy card has been played. Herschel wants his barn zombies and refuses to budge. Even after his daughter (granddaughter?) even calls him out on it, he doesn't seem to want to budge - though he does appear to have some doubt. That will come about later though.

Meanwhile, Dale notices Andrea has changed and is so totally into hunky Shane. So, while we're not sure if Dale thinks of Andrea as a daughter or a lover (seriously, the writers are doing us no favors by playing this so ambiguous), he still reaches out one more time to Andrea and tells her he has misgivings about Shane. Andrea, not wanting to hear it, tries to let Dale gently (either as a dad or boyfriend) but she still comes off as dickish. And thankfully (hopefully!) Dale kind of washes his hands of her, but not before realizing just how much power his RV wields as the holder of guns. So yeah, he totally takes them.

Darryl is around and back on his feet and wanting to go after Sophia...and I guess Carol is crushing on him a little because of his devotion to the search for her daughter, but yeah...that whole part isn't believable to me at all. It looks like they are setting Darryl up to have to make a choice down the road. One that will involve heading off with his brother or staying with the survivors, so I'll let this go right now, but I hope they handle it deftly and not how they're handling it now.

Shane, still angry that they're still looking for lost cause Sophia, and now also angry that they're not carving up the barn zombies Caligula style goes off on Rick. But Rick's got the Draw 4 card here; and he drops it on Shane. You can see Shane doing some quick calculating as Rick walks away. I actually thought this scene was pretty nifty; a lot was conveyed without words.

Shane of course goes and finds Lori, who immediately tries to cut him off at the path. But Shane, now a possible daddy, ain't hearing it. And this conversation, more than any of his other actions, is pretty much why he has become the villain of the show - because he attacks Rick...and attacks him in a conversation with his wife. Regardless of how you think of Rick as a leader, and whether Shane's decision making might be better, this conversation shows he has gone past the point of no return. Talking to Rick's wife and telling her her husband is not going to survive in this world is a hail mary for her affection. And methinks it will have larger ramifications down the road. Lori poo poos him though and tells him the baby is Rick's regardless of whose it is biologically. That sends Shane into a bit of a tizzy.

A tizzy that takes him down to the zombie barn (well, first a tizzy that takes him over to Carl, but I'm kinda sick of this kid who has matured about 15 years in the span of 3 days. SPOILER ALERT IF YOU HAVEN'T READ THE COMICS SKIP TO THE NEXT PARAGRAPH IF YOU DON'T WANT TO POTENTIALLY RUIN THE SHOW:

I understand Carl can possibly play a big role in the show based on what he did in the comic, and therefore it needs to be set up, but it seems like it's getting set up awfully quick. Sometimes this show moves at a glacial pace, other times it breezes through character's motives so quickly it's easy to miss (see Dale's turn on Shane). I assume they are setting up Shane to die and Carl to be a part of it, so they have to make him break the bond he and Shane have developed. But they don't have to do it in the span of half an episode. Also, I'm not really into kids acting like adults, so I'm a little bored by it all.)

BACK TO UNSPOILED GOODNESS...

Now a potential dad, Shane sees the zombie barn as more of a threat, so he's off to TCB with all the guns, except where are the guns? Not in the RV! Quickly assuming Dale stashed them somewhere (seriously, sometimes these characters make ridiculously farfetched yet accurate assumptions whenever the plot needs them to) he goes off to search for them. And either he's an absolute beast in the tracking department, or Dale is just really bad hiding things, because Shane finds him in about 6 seconds. Obviously there's a confrontation, because Dale, the wise old sage of the group has Shane pegged.

Now, I like Dale. I think he's a great character, and as I've said before, I believe he acts as the Greek chorus of the show. His observations are sharp and he is the most like the every person. So this sudden change, with him confronting Shane, seems silly. And his astute observation about what happened back at the high school with Otis didn't help the scene either. It felt necessary to move this conflict along, which suggests poor writing. I realize it has to come out, but wish we were given more clues of Dale's distrust throughout the series, and not these last two episodes. Anyway, plenty of threats are thrown between the two, but no one gets shot.

While that happened, Herschel drafted Rick into what may have been the craziest act of the show so far...zombie wrangling. Look, I'm sure on paper, the whole "wrestle zombies out of the swamp to hold in the barn" looked like a good idea, but it just didn't work for me. The comedy of seeing them so up close to the zombies, slipping about in the swamp mud hijacked the tension the scene was supposed to portray. You may feel different, but it didn't work for me. Of course, I realize something of that magnitude (showing Rick will do anything to keep the people under his charge safe, including something that he's opposed to (more political analogies) had to happen to reach the climax of this episode, so I'll go with it.

Shane wanders back and sees Andrea lounging about with the other people on the porch of the house. Which surprises him, since she was supposed to head out with Rick to look for Sophia. So now, everyone is wondering where Rick is, which makes his appearance leading two zombies with Herschel and the other guy really poor timing.

The group runs down to the barn, led by time bomb Shane. After some screaming, Shane pumps one of the zombies full of bullets to show Herschel the futility of keeping these zombies around. He then goes over to the barn, and breaks the lock, unleashing the barn zombies out to walk into a killing field. It's a dramatic scene, watching the group pick up guns and take out what of course used to be Herschel's family and neighbors. Rick can only watch, as he won't let go of the zombie he has, and his look the entire time says, "this isn't going the way I planned." Hannibal he is not.

Herschel slumps down, watching the carnage. The camera pans across everyone, effectively showing the different reactions and emotions the survivors have as they create the zombie carnage. A nice touch was Glen, gun in hand, and ready to shoot up some corpses, looks to Maggie for guidance. She, obviously in a twisted state of emotion, tearfully nods her acquiescence, obviously tortured by what she wants, and what needs to be done.

I'd be remiss if I didn't point out one shot I loved, and that was the overhead shot, above everyone, immediately following the slaughter. You could see Dale walking over to the scene, and I thought that would have been an awesome way to end the show, but I of course was wrong, because there was still one whopper to reveal...

One lone zombie remained in the barn, and now it peaked out the door, smelling the blood of living creatures. Stumbling out, she mindlessly faced the murder squad.

Zombie Sophia!

I know I griped a lot about how long it was taking to resolve the outcome of Sophia, and it felt like the pacing was a little off in the past 3-4 episodes. But this reveal completely surprised me, and made up for a lot of that. It's a shame when writers are put in a corner based on the schedule of a television show, but I think that's what happened here. This mini-season needed a shock at the end, and this one was a doozy.

Sophia's appearance gave everyone the grim perspective they needed. Herschel needed to realize the people he loved were completely gone; the survivors needed to realize it's not easy to give it up so easily when faced with someone they love.

Rick calmly walked up to Zombie Sophia, and punctuated that point by shooting her, and changed the game. That Rick did it showed the difference between him and Shane. His kill was one of mercy; not just for Sophia, but for everyone there. Shane's act of killing was mindless. For me, it was a great way to end this mini-season, and I'm excited to see where the show goes from here. Sophia's death felt like the end of part one, where the heroes and villains were fleshed out; book 2 will see the real conflict of the story. (By the way, that is not a comic spoiler in any way, just how I perceived the scene.)

Diving a little deeper, the scene is going to go a long way into what happens in the next set of episodes. Not only is there a big question about how/when/ Sophia got into the barn, but also if Herschel knew about her there, and if he did, how much did he keep from the survivors, knowing they were looking for a little girl. Methinks he is going to have a mutiny on his hands, and mutinies rarely play out well for the captains.

But more than that, it also pushes the rift between Rick and Shane further apart, albeit subtly. I'm not sure if we're supposed to take away the idea that Shane didn't shoot her because he couldn't (and if we were, that doesn't feel exactly right; they've been positioning him as being able to do anything), but having Rick step up and kill her shows that he is willing to do the things necessary to survive. Whether this is change in his character time will tell, but it countered nicely with Shane's earlier speech about how Rick won't survive in this new world.

Had Shane been the one to kill Sophia, it would have been the clear "turning to the dark side" moment for him, which I don't think we needed, and not what these writers like to do. Everything we've seen so far with these characters has been painted using shades of grey. Shane's actions make us hate him, but one can also argue that they were necessary. Lori's struggle with the decision of whether to allow her child and fetus to die were hard to hear, but also "realistic" given the circumstances a zombie apocalypse would create.

Only Rick has been kept pure, with his "no one gets left behind" approach. And yet now, with his shooting of Sophia, even that might have changed. This is a zombie landscape, and all bets are off. Yes, he wants to keep his humanity, and will struggle to do the right thing, but the realization of the world he's living in I think, has finally dawned on him.

I guess we'll see in February if I'm right!

Thoughts? Let me know! Tell me I'm loony!

Thoughts on The Walking Dead Episode: Secrets

Before I get started I wanted to come up with my own title for this episode:

Good Intentions, Bad Results

Melrose Place: Of the Dead

Empire Strikes Back with Zombies

The Episode that Proves This Show Needs Darryl Involved to be Good

Seriously, was everyone in this episode wearing Bad Idea Jeans?

Everyone has secrets. In a normal society that's bad enough. But when you add an apocalypse and zombies, the problems they cause multiply exponentially. Glen understands this, which is why he hates keeping secrets. Dale understand this, which is why he tactfully attempts to get them out in the open. Lori understands this, which is why she tries to murder them (or "abort" them according to how you define "life." Thank Goodness The Walking Dead is entering the abortion debate fray. I thought I was going to get bored with all the zombies.)

Unfortunately, life (there's that word again), has a funny way of fucking around with everyone.

Glen is racked with guilt about the secrets he's keeping for everyone. So he goes and gets Old Man Dale's opinion on things. So, off we head to Herschel first...

The walkers in the barn? They're family - and sick. Who's to say when (and if) their life is over? Or if they're even alive? Or dead?

That the entire debate is happening around a horse is especially ironic. I'm really hoping the writers did it on purpose, but I can't say subtly is really their specialty.

Striking out with Herschel, Dale stumbles into Lori, and waxes on about his pregnancy (or more accurately, his deceased wife's) experience. It wasn't great, and it doesn't seem to make Lori feel any better about her upcoming experience. So Dale is kinda 0-2 on his talks.

Meanwhile, Sophia is STILL missing. Rick is still intent on finding her, but also wants to make sure everyone can shoot. I guess. This part was a either a little confusing, or I was fast forwarding liberally. Apparently, Shane is the Yoda of weapons instruction. What he IS NOT the Yoda of is...

Handling his emotions

Saving people from Zombie attacks

Subtly wooing married women from their husbands during a zombie apocalypse

Haircuts

So the gang heads off to practice some shooting. When Andrea shows a knack for it, she graduates to the next class, which is "Learning How to Shoot a Swinging Tree Branch as You're Being Yelled At Like You're in Full Metal Jacket." 101. And she totally failed.

And as usual, Andrea totally martyrs up and walks out on the instruction, forcing Shane to chase her down, apologize and then offer the olive branch of "being his back up" into an neighborhood where Sophia might be. Sure why not? So they head there, and start searching the houses. Well, I think they search the houses. Shane says they have to search every house. And we see them in one house searching, and it feels like it's the first house, but then the zombies come, and Andrea totally uses the force to become one with her gun and mow them all down and they leave. So that was a little confusing.

What wasn't confusing was the total "fuck me eyes" she was giving Shane in the car. And the subtle crotch grab. So apparently zombie carnage is a turn on for Andrea. Shane, not one to turn down car sex is down for it.

Of course, when they get back to camp, the sex is stamped all over them, giving Dale a his last chance. Although I'm not 100% sure going up against Shane is the best of moves, I applaud his chutzpah. Framing it in a way that suggests he's concerned about the group, and totally not concerned Shane is going to satisfy Andrea in ways he can't, he brings up the whole Otis thing. Which...I thought was a little reaching. Save, going on a cruise, a zombie apocalypse has to be one of the easier times to get away with murder. And really, there's been no suggestion anyone doubted Shane's story. But then, Dale reminds us all about how Shane had Rick in his rifle sights back in Season 1, and so we can at least believe Dale has had some doubts about Shane. It's a little clunky, but the dots connect somewhat.

Surprisingly, Shane's a little perturbed by Dale's sudden defiance, and threatens him. And I'm not sure if we were supposed to think Dale's reaction was fear or bravery, since I have to imagine Dale would at least think his line of interrogation here was going to get Shane riled up enough to threaten him.

Meanwhile, Maggie gets attacked by a zombie, which is probably going to get her thinking that her mom, currently in the barn chasing a chicken with a broken leg (quick aside - do we really have to hinder the chicken that much? Wouldn't a healthy chicken be more sporting and therefore take the zombies longer to catch and therefore be more satisfying? Zombie apocalypse era PETA is going to have a field day with this!) is less her mom and more a creature that wouldn't give a second thought to devouring her daughter's brain.

Lori comes clean about the pregnancy to Rick, though in the most horrible of ways possible. I'm starting to think the actress who plays Lori may have kicked one of the writer's dogs or something, because they have painted an ugly picture of her. Though by the end, I guess it's possible we've turned a corner with her (now that she's come clean to Rick about everything, including Shane) and she'll be a little more likable, but seriously, she has done nothing to suggest she has too many redeeming qualities. Time will tell I guess.

So...tensions are rising, and something tells me the gang is wearing out their welcome at Herschel's homestead. What say you?

The Walking Dead Death Pool

Though I spent a good chunk of yesterday going over the reasons The Walking Dead wasn't very good, it doesn't mean I won't continue to watch it and be entertained by it. I find the show still has a lot of potential, and with some minor changes, it could really elevate itself. And that's why I've decided to create The Walking Dead Death Pool - a place where I will arbitrarily give odds for the characters chance of dying in the next episode...

Rick Grimes (100-1)

Good or bad, he's the emotional heart of the show, and he's not going anywhere anytime soon.

Carl Grimes (75-1)

With him apparently out of immediate danger due to being shot, I'm pretty sure he'll stick around at least for a little bit. Plus, it's also hard to imagine a television show would kill of a child. And if they've gone ahead and offed Sophia, it's really hard to believe they would kill two kids off.

Lori Grimes (75-1)

While it felt like they were setting her up to bite the bullet earlier in the season (with her damning flashback admitting there were potential problems with her and Rick; her suggestion of letting her son die) but now with the pregnancy reveal, I'd have a hard time believing they'd kill her and her unborn child.

Shane Walsh (50-1)

His slow turn to villainy hasn't come fully developed yet. That needs to happen before he challenges someone in the group enough to kill him, or he sacrifices himself for redemption. It will happen, just not in the next episode.

Andrea (4-1)

Andrea really isn't making any friends with her recent behavior. With her stupid gun fetish, fascination with death, and shooting of Darryl after being told not to use a gun, there isn't much left for her to do EXCEPT have a redemption scene of sacrifice. The writers have taken her up the big hill on the rollercoaster of hate - I don't think too many viewers would mourn her loss. She's one to keep an eye on. The only reason they might not take her out is to give Dale a chance to get some action.

Dale (10-1)

Not the quickest of the bunch, but close to the smartest, Dale certainly tries to stay on top of the situation (well zombie situation excluded). As sensible as he is amongst this group, I'd have a hard time believing the writers would kill him off. But he is slow, and we've seen some zombies really be able to move so...

Glenn (25-1)

A fan favorite, Glen probably isn't going anywhere. He's been established as the group's scrounger, as well as their guinea pig. While those two positions put him in a lot of dangerous situations, we also have to remember he just got into a relationship with one of the farm people. That has to resolve itself before Glen's usefulness goes away.

Daryl (11-1)

Viewer uproar would be immense if Daryl gets it in the next episode. Possibly the most complex and well developed character on the show (though that's not saying too much) Daryl is too much of a survivor to get killed by a bunch of zombies in a barn. Besides, I don't think his struggle to survive in the last episode would have received so much attention just to kill him in the next episode. Of course, if the writers want to shake it up and truly show no character is ever safe, this is the one to take out without completely disrupting the show.

T-Dog (6-1)

Racially speaking, the only reason T-Dog might be around is to buck the trend of "the black guy always gets killed first in a horror movie." I wish they gave him slightly more to do...it's not like it would be difficult. And the weird racial undertones they are keeping alive between him and Daryl leads me to believe we're on a collision course with Merle (alive Merle, not hallucinatory Merle) where the race stuff explodes. So while T-Dog isn't really doing much now, give it 3 episodes and I bet he comes to the forefront.

Carol (5-1)

I think we need Sophia resolution before we can truly get a read on how long Carol lives. If Sophia winds up dead, I predict a suicide. If she ends up alive, I predict at least a few more episodes for her. Of course, with how long it's taking to resolve the Sophia situation, Carol could be on the show for years.

Maggie (8-1)

I can't imagine killing her off so soon after sexing up Glenn. How cruel that would be for the one guy getting some on the show

Herschel (2-1)

Something's gotta give, and his explanation of barn zombies better be really good or he's going to have a mutiny on his hands.

Patricia (7-5)

Just lost a beloved one as we sit on the precipice of a significant confrontation? It's been nice knowing you Patricia.

Field (1-10)

You don't want to be a minor character on this show. Not since volunteering to get beamed down with Kirk to some alien planet has it been so hazardous to be a minor character on a show.

Did I miss anyone? Have any other thoughts?

What's Going on with The Walking Dead

I like zombies as much as the next guy. I like apocryphal stories as much as him too. So when the two genres have a baby, it feels like it should be right up my wheelhouse.

Only it's not. The Walking Dead has been unbearably frustrating for me, and I'm trying to figure out why.

The first season, after the pilot, (that was shot as gorgeous as any "end-of-world-scenario" could be shot) I was hooked. Unfortunately, the pilot set up an unrealistic expectation of what was to come. The series and its narratives ground to a complete halt, as it introduced boring character after boring character, with little to none additional action (The whole go back to Atlanta plotline was pointless; and went nowhere to boot).

Once they got to the CDC however, it picked up somewhat. The external (zombies) and internal (Shane's a potential rapist!) conflicts developed some gravitas, and the finale gave viewers a goal (Fort Benning) that offered some hope. Hope is important both in a zombie world and a zombie television show; without it there's no reason to live, or watch.

So, once the second season started, I was guardedly optimistic. Sure, the show was doing gangbusters, but I felt that was simply because zombies are alluring right now, and I didn't want to get swept up in that onslaught (it's here where a better writer would weave in an allegory about how the rabid viewers of The Walking Dead are zombies themselves, mindlessly taking in the show without questioning it's writing or overall arc, because let's face it - the writing is inconsistent at best). And with the news in between seasons of the show runner being unceremoniously dumped (mixed feelings here - I loved the pilot, which Darabont, the showrunner, directed, but what happened to the rest of the series under his watch?) there was definitely a curiosity to see how the show changed.

Well, I'm not sure it changed. Or if it did, it just moved sideways...

After catching the first two episodes "live" (meaning when they first aired) I fell behind and started recording the show. That in itself, should say something. It no longer became the "must see" show it had once been for me. It was now a "if I have nothing else to do I'll watch it" show.

And now that I've finally caught up, I feel I can say that it still has problems, and they need to be fixed or viewers will stop tuning in, ravenous as they might be for zombie fare.

Let's ignore some of the smaller, immediate gripes for the moment - oh ok, I'll just list them in quick detail...

How come in the premiere for the second season, the survivors could hide under cars and not be smelled out, when in the first season we had an entire episode devoted to getting covered in zombie guts to walk amongst the dead? Inconsistencies like that suck.

You would think with kids being raised in this world, their parents would suggest to them if they ever found themselves in danger, they should run toward a human and not down an embankment off the highway into a forest of unknown and potential zombie repute. At least that's how I'd raise my children in a zombie apocalypse.

Rick stashed Sophia in a hollowed out trunk in order to get the zombies to chase him real far away so that he could...kill them fairly easily real far away? Why not just kill them right where he found her? You know, the sensible solution?

Why do some zombies seem smarter than others? I've seen high school students dumber than that zombie trying to get at Andrea in the bathroom.

Why do the survivors split up every chance they get?

Anyway, I could sit here for hours and nitpick, but I'd like to get hopefully go a little deeper and get at the root of the problem. And that's the idea that the characters on The Walking Dead are not likable. Save for a few (and we'll get into that), the characters have little redeeming qualities. I find myself after every episode thinking that I would split the first chance I got if I was ever stranded with these people.

The women characters are horrendous. Stereotypical caricatures of what women really are like. Honestly, it feels as though men are writing their characters. And the male characters aren't much better. Let's take a look...

Lori - She lives with the guilt that she cheated on Rick with Shane. I understand that this would weigh on her a lot, but then why did we have the flashback that suggested she didn't have a happy marriage to begin with? And then why does she have to be the one that contemplates letting her son die so as not to raise him in this world? Honestly, it's been like 2 months since the zombies started walking the streets! You'd think she'd give it a little more time (also since she has the Fort Benning knowledge) before the hopelessness settled in.

Andrea - Even living in a zombie world can't stop her from getting catty with the rest of the survivors and holding grudges. What Dale sees in her...I don't get it. That she show Darryl isn't helping her cause either.

Carol - She has the thankless task of grieving for her daughter. And that's it. She doesn't get to do much else.

Dale - probably my favorite character, because he's playing the greek chorus of the show, acting and saying how the audience feels a lot of times, though on occasion he's used to advance the plot (not sure I needed him hammering home how bad of an idea it was for Glen to sleep with Maggie. We get it. Daddy's not going to be happy.)

T-Dog - It's hard to say much about him since the show gives him so little to do.

Glen - Used to be a great character, that was underused, but now has stepped up in the past few episodes and has shown that he can be as unlikable as all the other characters. Look, I didn't have a problem with the sex in the pharmacy. Guys are horny and when they can get some, they're going to act on it, regardless of the zombie threat. It was the way he acted immediately following the sex that soured me on him. The period stuff? Really?

Darryl - Probably the audience's favorite character, and with good reason. He takes action when it needs to be taken, but he also has a sensitive side. In fact, he's the most sympathetic character on the show right now. It remains to be seen how he takes the hallucinatory thoughts of his brother back with the group, but I hope he doesn't attempt to usurp Rick. Darryl seems the type that would just go off on his own and leave the others behind.

But these characters don't drive the show. It's Rick, and to a lesser extent Shane. The constant power struggle between the two former cops is obviously building to some sort of confrontation. I do think the shades of grey they're giving Shane to play with are interesting; sure he shot Otis in order to save himself...but his intentions, if slightly misguided, were in the right place. Otis shot Carl. Carl needed the supplies the two were getting. It wasn't a plan Shane concocted beforehand - he seized the opportunity the situation gave him and made a horrible choice. But looking back, was it a choice that had to be made? Maybe. And that's why his slow conversion to evil is being handled well so far. His confrontations with Rick (about Sophia, about the guns, etc.) are not wrong. If there's one thing that is intriguing about this show to me, it's that the sense of right and wrong have been flipped on its ear. Zombie world means right and wrong aren't so far away from each other now. Shane is representing this shift very well.

Unfortunately, the character of Rick is not. Obviously his intentions are good, and the decisions he's made have been the decisions the majority of the audience will agree on (continuing the search for Sophia), but it's very difficult to write a sympathetic character that is always facing doubt. Every decision he makes seemingly is questioned by everyone in the group, which causes the audience to start questioning the decisions too, and then ultimately begins to question the character.

It's very similar to what happened with Jack on Lost. But the Lost writers occasionally gave Jack some moments of pure heroism that helped sell Jack as a leader. We've yet to see that with Rick on The Walking Dead. Each decision Rock has made has not only been questioned, but the outcomes have not necessarily been good either. To be a leader, there has to be some sort of track record; Jack was a doctor who went around saving a lot of lives after a plane crash. Rick used to be a cop and...that's it for his leadership position.

Season 2 has been better than season 1, mostly because of Darryl. While the pacing still has some issues, the new characters have helped, and the school scenes with Shane and Otis delivered great tension. The Sophia storyline however is really being dragged out for no real reason than to give Shane and Rick something to argue about, and really they could argue about something else just as much (say, staying vs. leaving the farm). The barn zombies are obviously going to create a new tension between the characters, I just hope it gets resolved somewhat quickly (seriously, wouldn't they just pack up and leave, and let Dr. Crazypants hang out?)

Thoughts?

Finding Bigfoot Part 1: The Introduction

After the maddening ending (or, according to how you think the non-ending) of AMC's The Killing (and I will always add the AMC part there because they're the ones that ultimately let us all down) I've been absent-mindedly flipping through the television channel lineup wasteland, finally knowing what Moses must have felt like in the desert. While the Philadelphia Phillies usually keep me going, along with the hate watching of Food Network's Next Food Network Star and Chopped, they can only satiate my television appetite for so long.

It got so bad, in my darkest hour, I briefly contemplated watching Treme. But just as I thought all was lost, on my way toward flipping over to the revamped Lingo (yech!) I stumbled across quite possibly the greatest television show in the history of the world...

I'm of course talking about Animal Planet's Finding Bigfoot.

Before I go into more depth, I have a confession to make. I was (and let's face it, since I'm actively watching a show based in the genre, still am) a UFO/ghost/Bigfoot/etc. fan. I even started the UGM Club, back in fourth grade to study and get to the bottom of the mysteries of UFOs, ghosts and monsters. My favorite book as a seven year old was a comic book devoted to true stories of UFO encounters (which included an encounter that happened mere miles from my home).

As I've grown, my rational mind has matured, and logically speaking I can't speak to the authenticity to any of these things. While the stories still intrigue and entertain me, I don't blindly accept the existence of any of them. I like to be open minded, but also cynical when it comes to any "evidence." I guess you could say I have the heart of Mulder, with the mind of Scully (at least until before the third time she was attacked/groped/kidnapped by a supernatural creature yet still would obsessively demand a logical explanation and ignore the empirical data in front of her face).

So, a show purportedly looking into the legends of Bigfoot, as well as investigating current sightings with rational, skeptical minds, sounded like a good idea to me.

That Finding Bigfoot is the absolute opposite of that makes it that much better.

I have watched exactly three episodes of Finding Bigfoot - not because I'm plodding through the show, but because I want to savor them, breathe them in, rewatch them in all their splendid, possibly unironic joy. I want to take the same journey that Cliff, Matt, Ranae and Bobo are taking in real time. I want to savor each episode, in each state (who knew Bigfoots routinely showed up in not just the Pacific Northwest, but instates all over our union? I mean, besides the crew at the Bigfoot Field Research Organization, or B.F.R.O.).

I want this show to go on forever.

The show follows 4 "researchers" in the B.F.R.O. travel to a different area each week to follow up on a Bigfoot sighting. At least that's what I picked up watching my first episode. Honestly, I was so perplexed watching it for the first time that I may have missed some of the subtleties of the show. But there are two things I definitely did not miss...two things that I feel are the show's heart and soul.

1. The "reconstructions"

Pretty much every show starts with the team heading somewhere because they heard about a recent sighting. This first show was based in Georgia, following up on a policeman's dashcam video of something running across the road. After seeing the video, the team decides to "recreate" it using a human. You can watch the whole thing here:

Aside from the complete lack of regard for accuracy in recreating these things, (and the fact that I believe Bobo is only around as their Bigfoot model) the thing I love about these "reconstructions," is the validity the entire team puts into them. It's as though running across the road at night proves the existence of Sasquatch! Not only that, to hear most of the members of this team talk, you'd think Bigfoots (Bigfeet?) are about as common and real as deer. There is no doubt in my mind that there is any doubt in Cliff's mind (the de facto leader of the group) that Bigfoots (or Squatches as he loves to call them) exist. And that only stokes the fire of my enjoyment that much more.

2. The Growl/Howl/Screech

This really can't be described. It must be witnessed...

My favorite things from this clip?

• It seems each "researcher" has their own distinct howl, or at least thinks he/she needs a couple of different calls for different situations?
• Everyone involved also seems to think these howls have any effect on a Squatch, going so far as to suggest they heard a howl in response!
• It appears that the preparation/planning leading up to this bellow is quite intense. I wonder if Cliff was just a little mad when he was interrupted before he got one off, much like a pitcher gets annoyed when the umpire calls time in the middle of his windup.

This being the first episode of Finding Bigfoot that I've ever seen it's easy to say that I'm hooked. So much so that tomorrow, in Part II, I will give you a rundown of the best things I heard while watching my second ever episode of Finding Bigfoot.

Until then...

The Killing: Day 13

Apologies in advance if I skip over things in this recap. For previous recaps, my routine would be to watch it once for the enjoyment/pleasure, and then go back and watch it a second time and take notes. For last night’s episode however, I really didn’t feel like going back and watching it again.

I will reserve overall opinions about this episode and the series in general until the end.

Orpheus Descended (sounds like a classy porn title), starts off immediately where last week’s episode left off – with Linden caught red handed in front of Richmond’s computer. Aside from the “Orpheus” exposition (seriously, it’s like the writers never watched Lost and have to hit us over the head with their oh-so-clever naming conventions) the scene developed genuine tension, even though I’m pretty sure we all knew Richmond wasn’t going to kill Linden and roll her up in a carpet.*

*Semi-quick aside with no relevance to the story at hand – whenever I bring up bodies being rolled up in a carpet, I can’t help but think back to the story my mom once told me. My mother plays tennis roughly 75 million hours a week, and has standing court time with a specific group of women. When a woman couldn’t play due to a prior engagement or whatever, they would call a sub to make sure the other ladies could still play (if you didn’t already know, it takes 4 people to play doubles on a tennis court).

One morning, 3 ladies, including my mom, met at the courts as usual, and waited for the fourth to show up. Only she never did, and apparently no sub had been called. So the three ladies begrudgingly played Canadian doubles (something no tennis player ever wants to do) for awhile before calling it a day. My mother, annoyed that she had to stoop to such a level of substandard tennis, and also waste an otherwise beautiful morning, decided to get to the bottom of the missing player, by leaving a number of messages on her the offending woman’s answering machine. And yet there was still no response.

Until the next morning. When my mother opened up the newspaper.

It seems the woman, over the weekend had gotten into an argument with her lesbian lover (“I didn’t even know she was a lesbian!” was my mother’s first response) and been bludgeoned, stabbed, and then rolled up in a carpet.

My mother’s second response?

“Well, I guess that’s a good enough excuse to miss tennis.”

The moral of the story, (other than you should at least come to a better understanding of the way I am), is you really better have an excellent excuse of why you missed tennis/didn’t get a sub when playing with my mother.

At the height of the tension, Linden gets a call from Holder, and smartly lets Richmond know he is on his way over, in case Richmond was thinking of any chicanery. And as much as I’ve been down on the whole campaign storyline and mayor in general, I really think Billy Campbell pulled off the duality his character would need to portray a mayoral candidate who cares about the city by day/hooker hiring serial lover pedophiliac murderer by night thing. Definitely effective, and I stupidly thought we might finally get the payoff we’ve been waiting for.

Linden slinks out and meets up with Holder. Together, they start the process of linking Richmond to the murder. They start with the campaign car, a decent place to start – ON DAY ONE! Seriously, they’re just starting this now? Stan might have put Bennet in the hospital, but I’m thinking the detectives better shoulder some of the blame. Unless Bennet winds up being the killer.

Anyway, Linden notices the gas tank and figures out that it Richmond must have stopped to get gas during the night of the murder. A clever clue that again, SHOULD HAVE BEEN FIGURED OUT ON DAY ONE! Day two at the latest. It seems if you want to commit a crime, Seattle might be the place to do it.

Meanwhile, for whatever reason, the Larsen family storyline is still going. Terry drops Stan off at home, and while some people suggested a romantic tryst between those two (something that might have been interesting), nothing like that seemed o be brewing here. Which means some pivotal plot point will pivot on exactly that completely out of the blue in season 2.

Terry advises Stan to go inside and hug it out with Mitch, but Stan instead jumps in his truck and drives away, while Mitch looks on derisively from their apartment above. And it pains me to continue writing about all this, since what does all of this have to do with anything anymore?

The police chief is less than thrilled his detectives are looking at a now popular mayoral candidate as a murder suspect. He suggests to them they get their ducks in a row before bringing them in, and also says maybe they should do some actual detecting. Ha. Apparently the chief is now the greek chorus of the show.

Luckily for them, the early edition of the newspaper comes out, and the front page is a doozy…it has the names and faces of all the women Richmond has had an affair with, presumably since his wife died. And they all happen to look like Rosie. This is good enough for the detectives to go chase them down in order to get supporting evidence for their theory. Unfortunately, none of them are too forthcoming, and the one that is (a former campaign advisor), doesn’t believe Richmond is capable of anything dastardly. In fact, so sure is she that she high tails it over to Richmond headquarters to warn him the police are snooping around. But it’s Gwen who finds her, and seriously all this affair stuff comes completely out of left field, feels rushed and stupid, comes across as hackneyed. For 11.5 episodes we’ve been given a look into the character of Richmond (both a public and private look), and none of this has been teased, suggested, or hinted at. So now, we’re supposed to simply buy that Richmond isn’t such a nice guy? It’s a little hard to swallow.

Not for Holder and Linden though. They go off trying to track down the gas station they think Richmond stopped at on the murder night but are having no luck. Linden is getting frustrated and lets Holder know – but Holder has a theory. And at the time, while watching this, I felt this scene really resonated, and showed glimpses that the show had finally hit something of a stride. Sure, there are still plenty of misfires and WTF moments, but to get these two characters locked down is a step in the right direction heading into a second season. I especially enjoyed the “watching you do math is like seeing a dog with a hat on,” comment and I enjoyed that the scene implied that Holder had some detecting skills and that Linden was proud of him.

And yet how simple it is to destroy something you’ve taken awhile to build up.

Belko is back in the picture for a moment as he is cleaning his stuff out of the garage when Terry happens upon him. Terry, doing a 180 from previous meetings with Belko (and acting in a weird way since just the day before the police indirectly linked her to the death of her niece – but why would we want to show any fallout form that?) decides to extend an olive branch to Belko. An olive branch Belko of all people realizes is too late, and means nothing in the now broken home of the Larsens. When Belko is the voice of reason on the show, you know it’s time to maybe change your latitude.

Linden and Holder finally track down the gas station they believe Richmond stopped at. More importantly, the grizzled gas station attendant not only corroborates their theory, he goes one step further and tells them about a screaming girl. A screaming girl that Linden supernaturally realizes escaped the car and ran around back of the gas station – and ran into the woods to meet her eventual demise. This is all just so preposterous at this point that I have to laugh. The only thing that would have saved this scene for me would have been if Max Gail, or Wojo from Barney Miller fame, had been playing the grizzled gas station attendant like I had first thought before seeing his face. That would have given me a better excuse to post this:

... instead of shoehorning it in like I just did.

Unfortunately, the gas station didn’t have a surveillance camera. But that doesn’t stop Linden from calling out the force to comb the woods again. This time they find a shoe matching the other one they found with Rosie. The noose is getting tighter around Richmond’s neck!

Speaking of Richmond, Jamie and Gwen are talking, and Jamie is trying to get a read on Gwen since…really I’m not 100% sure what we’re supposed to take from here. That Richmond was cheating on her? I guess it’s possible, but it wasn’t made clear, unless I missed something. And it’s certainly possible I missed something since I was snorting heroin at this point to dull the pain of this show. Gwen assures Jamie she is a professional and that she’ll continue to do her job. As she leaves, Jamie confirms with Richmond that Gwen is “Ok,” as Richmond twirls his non-existent mustache, and ponders how awesome it would be to tie a damsel to some train tracks.

Linden goes to the chief with all their evidence…and he’s still not convinced the circumstantialness of it all will hold up. And I have to admit I agree with him. But then Holder comes out of the darkness with the smoking gun – a photo of Richmond time stamped the night of the murder from a tollbooth close to where Rosie’s body was found. Whew…for a moment there I thought we wouldn’t get closure and have to wait until season 2 to find out who murdered Rosie!

Linden gets all mad and shows us how much she’s involved in the case by showing up at Richmond’s and accusing him of the murder. They yell at each other some. Gwen hears it all go down. Then she goes and sits in her car in the parking garage. So does Linden. They chat. Gwen admits she was covering for Richmond, and that he was never really with Richmond the night of the murder.

Stan and Mitch finally talk. Well, that might be suggesting more than what happened. I mean, words were exchanged, but not a heckuva a lot was said. Ultimately though, Mitch leaves. Now, her leaving could be construed as some measure of guilt for something, and if you want to keep connecting the dots, it could suggest she knows more about Rosie’s murder. I’d love to say that we can count on the cops to have cleared the Larsens’ whereabouts on the weekend of the murder, but that would be suggesting actual police work was done during this investigation which, I’m sorry we can’t assume anything here. I also like to think that I could establish a decent argument as to why neither Stan nor Mitch could be the murderers, but with the preposterous, illogical plot swings this show has already taken, I’d just look like an idiot.

But wait…all the Larsen stuff is moot right? Because we got the murderer. Linden and Holder go down to Richmond’s speech and arrest him, despite his proclamations of innocence. Thankfully, we don’t have to believe him because we have a mountain of evidence against him. Let’s take a look, shall we?

• Body was found in a Richmond campaign car
• He asked a hooker if she ever wondered what it felt like to drown
• He had a bunch of affairs with women that sorta kinda looked like Rosie
• He knew Rosie
• The woman is currently sleeping with told the police he came home the night of the murder “soaking wet”

Oh yeah, this guy’s Ted Bundy. Lock him up!

Whatever, he’s guilty as sin. Linden and Holder share a nice moment where she unofficially passes the torch to him, before… yes, that’s right GETS ON A FLIGHT TO WHEREVER IN CALIFORNIA. THIS SUBPLOT STILL EXISTS!

And all the while the cops are wrapping things up, Belko, obviously angered that his fake family has been torn apart, is planning a murder of his own. Richmond’s! He’s off to go Jack Ruby him as he is being brought into custody. Unfortunately, the screen goes to black before we know if he succeeds.

And while I know that was the last scene, I wanted to save the following to dissect in a little more detail…

Jack and Linden are actually on the plane to Wherever California (quick aside – I love that Jack was all upset that they were leaving just when he was getting to know his dad. Never mind that his dad lived in Chicago anyway so that it didn’t matter where he was. Apparently the writers ignored that.). Just as Linden is about to sit down, she gets a call on her cell phone…it’s from the someone in the Department of Video Footage Taken at Toll Booths, or something like that, letting her know that her request for the video footage can’t be processed because the video camera has been broken for like 2 months. But wait a minute…Holder already got that stuff, so what’s going on?

Cut to:

A comically framed shot of Holder in the passenger seat of a car (literally, the shot almost was a split screen, they went to so much trouble to conceal the identity of the driver) speaking to a mystery person about how Linden “bought” the fake pictures of Richmond.

And that’s how we end season 1 of The Killing.

Ok.

To say I was disappointed with this episode would be a slight understatement.

Why they chose not only to not 100% solve the murder of Rosie Larsen in this season makes no sense from a creative standpoint, nor from a ratings standpoint. Creatively, the show has already drawn out the case over 13 hours, when 7 would have been enough. The dead ends and blind turns the show took did little more than frustrate viewers; They certainly did nothing to advance the case, nor did they advance character development (And they made me use the word “nor” twice in one paragraph). From a ratings standpoint, I guess the argument could be made that viewers will turn into season 2 to find out who killed Rosie, but in this day and age of the Internet, I think that’s a false hope. I’m much more inclined to read about it, as I’m fed up with how the show treated me for 13 weeks. I don’t want to invest more time because I feel cheated and manipulated.

I think the biggest problem I have is what they did with the character of Holder. With this show, with so many characters, and so many suspects, the two detectives working the case have to be the ones the audience identifies with. They are also the only two characters the show took time to develop (I guess an argument can be made that Richmond’s character was developed as well, but his 180 degree heel turn at the end came out of left field, so really, how was he developed?) and then they go and throw it all away with a 5 second scene that comes out of left field and doesn’t feel like something the character would do.

And really, why exactly would Holder be involved? His backstory worked perfectly. In the beginning he was shady. Had they kept him at that level of shadiness for the entire 13 episodes, then yes, his heel turn would have worked. But they didn’t. They took all the things he did and went the sympathetic route, by turning him into a recovering addict. And then, they developed the relationship he had with Linden and made him a nice guy, going so far as to build him up as a hero (when he forsakes his own family to stay with Linden in her time of need). To then make him a conspirator in the murder case is nothing more than to throw a red herring into the mix to make the audience gasp. Only in this case, the gasp was one of anger.

Holder was the best part of the show. His character felt interesting and went against the grain of normal depictions of detectives on television shows. There was enough interest in him that we didn’t need a schlocky, drive-in movie type twist with him. Never mind the fact that him helping to frame Richmond makes zero sense. Just in the episode before, he was surprised to learn Richmond was Orpheus (we know this because he found that out when he was alone; so there would be no need for him to “pretend” to anyone that he was surprised. In fiction we have to trust the actions of a character when he/she is alone, otherwise the system breaks down. And yes, I understand the irony of saying this about a show that has broken many of the other traditional norms of fiction. Let’s just move on before I throw my computer out the window). So, we have to then assume he was reached by a shadowy figure, convinced and bribed to betray his partner, the police force and his new job in LESS THAN 24 HOURS. Because there’s been no hint before this that would make sense. Even though times he met with people in cars…if he were setting up Richmond then, why wouldn’t have steered the investigation toward him from the beginning? These are the logic bombs the showrunner needs to deal with – and deal with soon. Because season 2 is going to be a clusterfuck from a ratings standpoint.

But I digress.

I’m too tired to go into too much detail about the rest of the episode or even the series. If you want to get really angry about the direction it took, read this interview with Veena Sud, the showrunner for The Killing. I particularly enjoy the part about how he (she?) suggests they had the idea for this ending from the very beginning, regardless of whether they would get a second season or not.

Sure you did Veena.

So…will I watch the second season? My immediate reaction is to say no, that this first season and its ending was too inconsistent to invest my time. But I’m not so sure that will be my reaction once it comes around for round 2. I’m still invested in who killed Rosie, and would like a definitive answer to that. Obviously, in this Internet age it will be easy to find that out without watching the show, but there are also other plots I would like to see wrapped up. Perhaps it is like a gaper delay on the road, where you can’t turn away from the scene of a car crash – you want to see how bad it really is. I want to see who was in the car with Holder (it almost has to be the other mayor, or it really makes no sense), why Holder would do it, whether Belko succeeded in his Jack Rubiness, and just why Mitch would walk out on the rest of her family.

Though I really have no desire to learn anything about Linden’s ex, current or whatever.

So…hopefully you enjoyed these reviews/recaps and they helped vent your frustration toward the show. I know they did for me. I’ll be on the lookout for another show to do the same, so if you have any suggestions, please let me know.

Suspect List

Everyone. Duh.

The Killing: Day 12

Oh boy.

It seems The Killing is about to unveil it’s killer, and if what we’ve been led to believe in Beau Soleil is true, than it has fallen into the cheapest, paper-thin cliché detective stories employ.

It’s something I like to call the “Special Guest Star Corollary."

For example – I love Law & Order. I even enjoy the “Ripped from the Headlines” shows they relied on heavily. But, the flaw it magnified hundreds of times over was the special guest star they would commonly bring in. It didn’t matter who it was – if the show was advertising someone fairly famous guest starring on the show, 95% of the time that was the murderer. And so if the police didn’t get to their door early in the episode, the suspense of the whodunit became flimsier and flimsier as the hour dwindled. Now, there was plenty else to like in Law & Order, so they could get away with it. They had a built in audience that they established early, that would tune in regardless. So it worked for them.

But now comes a 13 episode show based on a Danish show, with nothing established (other than it is airing on AMC, and, if you drink the AMC Kool-Aid, nothing but quality runs on that network, never mind the fact that it indirectly calls movies like The Bone Collector and Batman Forever classics – and that’s a contradiction that intrigues me) for the audience to lean on. In fact, the only thing the audience really knows is that the show will follow the investigation of a murdered girl.

And in the beginning, that’s what we get; a show that sets up the murder and principal characters very well. Oh sure, there are some diversions along the way, but for the most part, the premiere does it’s job well. Yes, there’s a campaign for mayor going on, but I’m sure that will tie in.

Well, now here we are, at episode 12. One away from the finale. And yes, the mayoral campaign has been tied in. Unfortunately, episodes two through eleven didn’t hint at the connection at all, so it’s been a little jarring.

Unless you employed the Special Guest Star Corollary from the beginning.

Yes, you are correct that Billy Campbell is not a special guest star on the killing, but he’s easily the most recognizable name in the cast. Which means he’s going to have a significant role to play in the series. Which means all of us who dismissed him from the get go (myself included), no matter how sound or logical our reasoning may have been, ignored what was probably the most glaring and obvious finger pointing since before the show even started.

The Special Guest Star Corollary.

And while we still have an hour to go in this murder investigation, it’s really looking like our mayoral candidate is guilty as sin. I guess a hail mary can still be called and they can go a different direction (my favorite suspect is certainly in the mix, but seems like such a red herring that I’d be surprised if it were him), but I’d be surprised if they did.

And I think that’s been the overwhelming problem with this show. They’ve spent so much time making sure we didn’t have any idea who the killer was until the very end that it weakened the middle episodes. I mean the investigation Holder and Linden are running is nothing any reasonable person would say is “by the book.” And the diversion the show took with Bennet and the Larsens took too long to deliver any suspense; everyone knew it wasn’t him based on the fact that he was fingered by the police in episode 3. Why we had to wait 3 more episodes to completely exonerate him made no sense.

I wanted to like The Killing, and I think I gave it a fair chance. I just wish it had rewarded me for doing so.

We start with people digging, at night, in the rain. A skull is found, and we learn this is the waterfront project the current mayor has invested so much time into. Through television clips and Jamie’s cracks, we learn it’s a burial ground, which will immediately sink the project, and apparently the mayor’s bid for re-election. I guess. This was all confusing and disjointed to me (though I am also trying to tend to a 104 degree fevered two year old, so I may have missed an item or two), and not a little bit convoluted. I understand the construction was a big part of the mayor’s campaign, but it’s not like he killed a hooker or anything. Couldn’t he simply suggest that the burial ground is sacred, work to preserve it and get some votes that way? Is that crazy? Should I be a campaign manager?

Linden is talking on the phone with her deadbeat husband as she’s getting into the police station. She’s not happy Jack was with his father. Thank God this is just being done on the phone. We don’t need any new characters introduced in the eleventh (twelfth?) hour. She keeps talking and Holder shows up to with the security camera footage of a sexed up Rosie. She’s been making large deposits at the casino ATMs, only not into her personal account.

Over at Richmond HQ – they’re celebrating. Apparently this is going to blow up the current mayor’s reelection bid, which makes me think Seattle politics are pretty sophomoric. But enough about the politics – Drexler is back in the picture! He’s having a party to commemorate the sinking of the mayor’s campaign, and he’s invited Richmond. But Richmond, having gotten Drexler’s 5 million already, isn’t too excited to be around him, so he suggests Jamie go in his stead. We need someone there to let the audience in on some of the most ridiculously contrived creepiness I’ve ever seen on television. Sorry, I’m getting ahead of myself.

Oh good, we’re about to catch up with the wreckage of the Larsen family. Mitch is going over the books in an attempt to figure out where the missing money went. Janek calls and leaves a message for Stan, casually mentioning the money he lent him. Mitch is none too pleased, which is why she probably didn’t pick up the phone when Stan called asking about the kids. Why this angle is coming back, I can’t answer, other than to guess it’s a flimsy attempt to throw some suspense at certain characters? This show has established no rhythm so I have no idea.

So whose account was Rosie depositing all that money into? Aunt Terry’s! Linden and Holder go off to question her about it. She’s not very forthcoming and not a good liar at all. And while this scene did nothing to advance the plot (since there’s another one with the exact same characters coming up shortly that does advance the plot) I still enjoy these moments because of Holder, or more specifically Joel Kinnaman and how he portrays Holder.

Mayor Adams and Gwen meet on the street. He gives her an envelope. An ominous envelope, that contains dirt on Richmond. Dirt I assume he won’t use to get back into the race? Even though he’s currently paying off a former intern that he had an affair with? His scruples kick in now? Maybe they’re just setting it up for the finale, but his excuse of, “I’m doing this as because I’m a friend of your father,” doesn’t fit in with the character traits they’ve set hum up with. And it’s not like they needed him to be the one to deliver the pictures. The whole campaign plot line has completely deflated after this episode.

Holder and Linden meet up with Holder’s old undercover partner. She’s…colorful. I can’t wait until season 2 to see more of her. She’s working vice and she has some bits and pieces of information they can use to start connecting more dots of the escort angle they are now working. An angle that seriously should have been on the table since episode 1, no? A young girl found in the trunk of a car (of a politician no less) with expensive clothes? Or am I just a silly armchair detective that’s seen too many Columbo episodes?

And now comes this week’s most ridiculous scene – and it’s really gotta be in the running for series’ more ridiculous scene, right? Jamie shows up at Drexler’s place, or a place that Drexler has rented out for a party. It’s not clear. What is clear is the ceiling, which is really the bottom of a pool…a pool filled with nubile young ladies. Jamie, taking it all in and coming to the realization that this is not the kind of party he wants to be at, then spies Drexler wearing a robe and a speedo. This is the second time they’ve subtly suggested Drexler is gay…or at least that’s the vibe I got. The first was the scene where he was at an underground fighting ring, and now this one. Both times Jamie was involved too. And honestly, I have no idea what they’re trying to infer with any of the subtext here. The text of this scene though is quite clear – Drexler is a weird dude, has a thing for young, beautiful ladies, and at least knows the number for Beau Soleil, Seattle’s prominent(?) escort service?

Mitch visits Stan in prison. Although, perhaps “confronts” is a better word here. Mitch and Stan talking. Stan wants to know if she bailed him out and she said no, you know because of the whole money is missing thing. Then she brings up the Janek call. Then she brings up the gambling. Then she brings up that she thought he changed. Then she brought up that she’s sorry she pushed him into beating up an innocent guy. Oops, no she didn’t. I guess she forgot about that. But Stand didn’t, and he says as much. The whole scene was weird, as it was shot from behind Mitch the entire time, and we never saw her reaction. Which means of course it was important, and she’s probably the killer. Stan leaves and says, “at least I could admit what I did.” So are we supposed to take that to mean Mitch didn’t want to confess about the Bennet beating, or did she do something in the past that she refuses to admit. And why wouldn’t Stan know that they had no money? He’s the one that bought the house. Wouldn’t he have known there was no money for bail and you know, maybe tell Mitch? Or at least give her a heads up? Ugh, if I wanted the dysfunctional Waltons, I would watch the Waltons for 45 minutes, turn off the show and then come up with a plausible, dysfunctional ending to it in my head. And then probably post it to the Internet.

Heading back to the precinct who should be there but…good Chirst why – Linden’s ex. Who looks nothing like a deadbeat father, and more like an insurance salesman. Or a copywriter with a penchant for trench coats. He wants to be back in Jack’s life. She doesn’t want him there. This goes on for about 2 minutes and he leaves, and the only thing I can imagine they included this scene to add an yawning child custody subplot to keep a thread going in case they get picked up for Season 2. And before you scoff at such a crazy notion, read this link.

Checking out this Beau Soleil website, they realize it’s going to be difficult to find a picture of Rosie since the pictures all cut off the head. Luckily, they can identify Aunt Terry since she apparently can’t be bothered to own more than one sexy jacket (your opinion of “sexy” may differ from the show’s definition like mine did.)

And here’s the second Linden/Holder/Aunt Terry confrontation scene. Terry cries, and the detectives figure out Rosie must have checked out the site a few days before her murder. They also get the nom de plume of a bad seed who likes to talk about how it would feel to drown. Hey, didn’t Rosie drown? Wait a minute…

Over at Richmond campaign HQ, people are asking him some tough questions. And I’m not sure who they’re supposed to be…some political group? The press? But there are 3 things that seem important that come away from this:

1. 1. He denies any responsibility for leaking the intern affair story
2. 2. He speaks lovingly about his wife when asked, seemingly for the first time publicly
3. 3. Gwen is getting a slightly different picture of him than she at first thought

This show really has problems with identifying characters! We’re now with Stan in jail, talking to who I can only assume is some sort of court appointed psychologist. Stan scoffs at the notion than talks about a dream (I’m pretty sure it was a dream, though they definitely established some ambiguity around it. I don’t know what to think anymore).

Holder and Linden refreshingly do some police work and track down the escort service in order to find out who this “Orpheus” character is. Apparently the service is being run out of a sneaker store. I will never walk into a shady sneaker store again without wondering what’s going on in the basement. Actually let me rephrase that. I will never walk into a shady sneaker place for the first time and not wonder about what’s going on in the basement. Actually, let me rephrase that one more time. I have never not wondered what was going on in the basement of a shady sneaker place. I guess what I’m trying to say is, if the police need to bump up their arrest numbers, sitting outside a shady sneaker joint is probably going to help them out. Anyway, they find out Orpheus deleted his account the night of the murder, but they got his email. Saucy!

The deconstruction of the Larsen household continues, this time with Terry and Mitch squaring off…perhaps for the love of Stan? Does Terry covet what she sees (and there’s my totally obscure reference of the week. I’ll mail a cookie to the person that can name the movie)?

Linden writes an email to Orpheus, simply with the subject line, I KNOW WHAT YOU DID. If we had a few more episodes to go, would it have been crazy for a Jennifer Love Hewitt cameo here – even as the lab tech Linden calls to babysit her email account? Meanwhile, Holder is off on a sting to get the escort that complained about Orpheus. He gets her, but she refuses to name who Orpheus is, even though it’s pretty clear she knows him. Holder goads her to name Tom Drexler (as do I scream at the television) but she won’t, which probably sinks my theory that it was him.

Stan makes bail and he’s as surprised as we are when it’s Terry and not Mitch there to pick him up. Ironically using the money Rosie got from hooking? I’m not sure Stan would be happy with that if he ever found out.

Holder, sitting alone in the hotel after presumably letting the escort go with a warning, gets a call from said hooker, who leads him on a real weak scavenger hunt to find the identity of Orpheus. And if you haven’t figured out who it is by now, well – I guess the next five minutes of the show were exciting for you.

Linden sets off to speak with Richmond about Drexler, and is nice enough to warn him to keep his distance from him. Unfortunately, before they can strip down and get sexy (seriously, is it me or is Linden going out of her way to show up at Richmond’s place at night?) Richmond gets a phone call. Excusing himself, Linden decides to check in on the lab tech she has sitting at her computer. His employment isn’t doing anyone any favors arguing for a larger Seattle police budget. Anyway, she suggests he send the email again, to bug Orpheus, and when he does, what do we hear? Why it’s some sort of electronic alert sound – something you would hear when you received an email! It seems like such a strange coincidence that Linden asks him to send the email again – and yup, just like that, the alert dings again. In fact, it dings every time the guy sends one, leading Linden to hunt down Richmond’s computer – which seems to be in a closet.

Right around the same time, Holder is finding out the same thing Linden is…Orpheus is Richmond, and at long last the campaign and murder investigation fully intertwine. Is this a good thing? I don’t know – I’m not thrilled that there’s been no real hint that Richmond is secretly into prostitutes. I mean, even Drexler was given a creepy vibe early on. Richmond as the murderer feels cheap and somewhat of a gimmick.

The last shot of the show is Gwen finally opening up the package she got from the mayor (because why wouldn’t she wait all day to open up potentially explosive evidence on her mayoral candidate/current lover?) and finding a bunch of pictures of Richmond snuggling up to a brunette who may or may not be Rosie. But it wasn’t Gwen, and things don’t look good in the mayoral race of Seattle right now.

Suspect List

Christ, who cares…either we all think we know who did it, or none of us know because this show has given us nothing to go on and it will be completely random. With the pattern of this show, it really could be anyone. Oh all right…

Tom Drexler – Creepy, awesome, and having plenty of reasons to do it, it really feels like he’s a red herring. If this were Clue he’d definitely be the murderer in one of the endings, but it’s not, so I’m guessing he just loves to hit his ladies, and not kill them.

Any Larsen – Possible, and enough has been dangled out there so that if it does happen to be one of them, there won’t be a riot. I guess.

Bilko – He’s got the creepy factor, but I’ll be mad if he did it because it means the detectives are just really stupid.

Richmond – Ugh. It’s him, right? Unless…

Jamie – He did it to cover his boss’ tracks? Stranger things have happened.

So…thoughts? Leave ‘em in the comments.