Thursday, May 29, 2008

Live Blogging the Lost Finale

Trying to update after every commercial and still not miss a second of the Lost finale. We'll see how it goes. I started a hair late, but hopefully will catch up as we get longer commercial breaks.

9:30 Update

Keamy - I don't think he's dead. I still think he's jerry-rigged up to the explosives on the boat. So his heart is still ticking. Total badass too kicking Sayid's ass with a massive knife wound.

9:36 Update

Why doesn't Michael simply start pulling wires to dismantle the bomb? Hasn't it been shown he can't be killed? Sounds like a better plan than freezing the battery to me.

Ok, so who is Charlotte? Claire in later life? Someone we haven't met?

Of course the tape doesn't work. Why would it work?

I want to see Locke and Ben star in their own sit com. Who wouldn't watch that?

Suddenly Lost is a comedy.

Who's coming down to the Orchid? Jack? Keamy? (I hope).

9:49 Update

Ok, so we have most of the Oceanic 6 together, + Sawyer.

Keamy cannot catch a break. That's the second time someone has attacked him from behind.

9:57 Update

Well, now we see how Sawyer gets left behind. So now we need to get Jin (and presumably Walt) away from the rest of the Oceanic 6, if indeed they make it to the boat.

Anyone else think we don't find out who Jeremy Benthem (I hope that's his name) is until next year? My guess is he's some sort of conspiracy guy who kep bugging the Oceanic 6, though I'm not sure why his death would hit Jack so hard then.

Charlotte is Aaron with sex change? Ok that would be too weird even for Lost I think.

Keamy still hanging on I guess if the green light is still on.

So, do we lose the island in time or what? Ben was putting a lot of metal in a place we've been told it shouldn't go.

10:11 Update

Hmmm, so Benthem is someone else. I'm hoping this doesn't mean that's all we find out about who's in the coffin. Of course my theory that he's a conspiracy nut looks bad. Hey, you win some, you lose some. Doubtful it's Ben, or Sayid wouldn't be so calm I don't think. What if Sayid means someplace that is safe is "forward" instead of back - meaning the island moved into the future.

I'd say Jin was definitely dead, but we all know how this show likes to play around.

I see Desmond got off the boat which is good, but who knows if that means he's safe.

10:19 Update

So, who do we think Sun is referring to? Ben? Desmond? Does she really want to go back there because she thinks Jin is still alive?

I see Sawyer had to take his shirt off to make it back to the island.

Did Ben say he had to "change?" Like clothes? Think he's going to put on an Oceanic outfit to somehow swindle his way off the island?

Something happens in the next 40 minutes to change Jack's mind about lying about the island. I can't even begin to imagine what it is.

10:33 Update

Well, having an island disappear before your eyes is probably something big enough to make you want to lie.

I don't like the fact that Desmond was in a helicopter crash.

Ok, so does Lapidus and Faraday somehow fall into a time loop - which would make them both "know" about the island in the future because they keep experiencing the past? Yeah, I don't know what that sentence means either.

They wouldn't kill Desmond in a simple helicopter crash, would they?

10:47 Update

No they wouldn't! Though they keep teasing me.

So Claire doesn't want them to go back, Jack wants them to go back, Kate doesn't want them to go back, Sayid and Hurley probably are going back, and Widmore and Sun are looking to go back (could Widmore be the captain of the Black Rock and have done what Ben did long ago to save the island from other people that were coming to get it - someone like Ben? That hurts my head.

Portugese on the boat, right? That can only mean one th- Penny! And...hmm, it seems something must be in my eye or something. It's getting misty in here.

11:00 Final Update

Why wouldn't Aaron stay with Penny and Desmond? The kid has to take another 8-9 hour raft ride in the sun? Is that healthy? Is Kate that selfish?

Jack is in some really bad shape. Speaks to Matthew Fox as an actor.

Think the island they landed on is same one Jack had his dalliance with Bai Li (or whatever) on, and got his tattoos?

Ok, Locke in the casket was a surprise. I guess the island will heal him when they go back. Also guess he wasn't cut out to be such a good leader since "bad things happened" after they moved the thing.

So Faraday...where did he go, along with all those other expendable people?

Oh, now that we know Desmond does get off the island, do you think she meant Ben or Desmond? I'm guessing Widmore would have interest in finding either one of them. But why would she sell out Desmond? Does she blame him for the bomb stuff?

That's it for me. I hope some of these ramblings are somewhat coherent. Some things came true, some things turned out to be wrong, and some things simply make no sense. I think that sums up Lost perfectly. Feel free to post in the comments to laugh along with what I thought was going on...

Here's to a great season 4 - and hoping that season 5 will match it.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

The top 7 Nickelodeon Kids' Game Shows

When Nickelodeon’s Games and Sports (GaS) channel was dropped from cable, we all lost something. Whether it was the chance to relive our childhoods of being babysat by sweet television, or kick back and giggle at pre-pubescent children thrust together on a team try to awkwardly high-five each other, GaS had something for everyone.

And then Comcast yanked it away from us, forcing it to only live on in our memories, and the occasional you tube video.

But that will never change how super awesome these game shows were. And so, to honor them, I have ranked the top 7 children’s video games as they appeared on GaS. With rumors of possibly streaming them online I wait with baited breath. Until then however, this is all we have…

7. Get the Picture

Teams took turns eliminating giant blocks that hid a picture of…whatever. It could be a rose, it could be Kid n’ Play. The reason to catch episodes of Get the Picture were for catching the ever elusive Power Surges that were sprinkled into the game play. Actually, the Power Surge wasn’t all that exciting when you got right down to it, but host Mike O’Malley certainly didn’t let that bring his excitement level down. I also loved that someone had to come out and lift up some sort of safety bar for the kids when they competed in Power Surges, as though they would hurl themselves into the giant video screen had there not been some sort of barrier to corral them.

O’Malley made this show what it was. Carefree in attitude, he blatantly acted as though he needed to get his contract voided so he could start on Yes, Dear a few years early. He openly scorned and mocked contestants for not knowing something. I guess the allure of being on television (and getting to compete in a Power Surge) kept the line of contestants coming, because it certainly wasn’t O’Malley’s amicability. But I like that in my kids’ game show host. These kids don’t need to be coddled, not even on Nickelodeon.

6. Finders Keepers

Finders Keepers had the distinction of switching hosts as much as Card Sharks did. Unfortunately, they never found their Bob Eubanks, instead winding up with 2 guys that were immediately forgettable. One hated his life and openly pined to get fired, the other had a ‘Black Hole Sun’ look to his face that had to scare the constestants on a daily basis.

Still, neither host could destroy the thrill of trashing a room – which was the object of Finders Keepers. Teams competed against one another to search one of the rooms in the Finders Keepers mansion for items that were “cleverly” hidden, usually in a faux Ming Vase or a vat of dirt (because you know, every house has a giant vat of dirt). The challenge at the end had the winning team traipsing through a variety of rooms looking for more hidden objects. I loved the dichotomy between many teams; some would take a Little House on the Prairie approach and daintily pick up bowls and what not looking for clues, while others got very Hunteresque in there, treating dishes and glasses like a perp with an attitude problem. It was always interesting to guess which way a team would go.

Unfortunately, Finders Keepers doesn't have a huge web presence, which is a crying shame. But here is another link that can give you an idea of how crazy this show really was.

5. Double Dare

The Jeopardy of kids’ game shows, Double Dare mixed standard trivia with manic, LSD-inspired “physical challenges” for the kids to opt for if the questions got tricky. The winning team then got a chance to take on the obstacle course, a series of messy, disgusting Mouse Trap-inspired activities. Each accomplishment in the obstacle course won you a truly awesome prize, whether it was a pair of roller blades or your very own karaoke machine.

And how awesome was it, years later, when we all found out Marc Summers had OCD? Now we had an opportunity to go back and check the old shows as though they were Zapruder films to see Mark flip out when chocolate frosting splattered across his face.

Please don’t get this confused with Double Dare 2000. Jason Harris didn’t have the natural geniality Summers had, and the show suffered.

4. Figure it Out

I could easily write 10,000 words about this show, and still might some day. I’d love a tell-all book about what went on behind the scenes on Figure It Out, from how funny Kevin Kopelow really is, to the sexual tension between a post-puberty Danny Tamberelli and the always sexy host, Summer Sanders. Unfortunately, I think I might be the only person calling for something like that.

A child’s version of I’ve Got a Secret, Figure it Out always turned up the bizarre quotient. Lori Beth had to have been hated by the contestants, as she always seemed to guess the answer at the last possible moment, sending the children home with a piece of the Aggro Crag, and not a cool trip to Space Camp.

I’ll stop now.


Oh how I miss thee, GUTS. Mike sending it over to Mo, Mo pretending she and the judges huddled together to confer about a rule discrepancy before making a final ruling… O’Malley’s complete sell of each competition as though it happened during the 1968 Olympics. He could have mailed it in, but ever the consummate professional (possibly the first time he’s ever been described like that) he took his job seriously and announced Ragin’ Rapids without a hint of irony.

I won’t go into a detailed account about what happened with Bebe on an episode of GUTS. What I will do is beg to start streaming these episodes online soon, so that I may one day share it all with you. And if you did see that episode with Bebe, you know what I’m talking about.

2. Legends of the Hidden Temple

A talking rock…a final obstacle course that truly went on forever that featured guys in skimpy clothing jumping out and grabbing pre-pubescent children…a host that rappelled into the arena to start the show…there are so many great things that Legends of Hidden Temple had going for it.

One of the more demanding kids’ game shows, Legends of the Hidden Temple also appeared to have the largest budget for a game show. Papier-mâché boulders cannot be easy or cheap to make – and Legends had an abundance of them. The other thing I loved about LotHT was how elaborate the entire show got. From starting out with 6 competing teams of 2 children, to 4 eclectic rounds highlighting different talents, I’m shocked it lasted 3 years. I mean, I still see no reason to have a talking, animatronic puppet delivering the “legend” when you had a perfectly decent host in Kirk Fogg willing and able to read a 3-paragraph story to the kids.

Silver Snakes was my go to team. They were always a safe bet to make it at least to the second round. Of course, it was next to impossible to accurately handicap a team at the beginning, since intelligence is not an easy trait to read in a 13-year old child.

And then there was that final challenge of recovering the ancient artifact from the temple…one of the hardest things I’ve ever seen a 13 year old child accomplish. The number of obstacles they had to overcome was astounding. I can only hope there were plenty of spotters behind the scenes to ensure the kids’ safety on the show.

Here's just an awful attempt at trying to do the Silver Monkey room. I mean this is simply terrible...

And I link to this awesome site because A. it probably has the most information about Legends of the Hidden Temple out there and B. because I had no idea geocities still existed.

1. Nick Arcade

On the surface, Nick Arcade is surprisingly ordinary. Kids playing video games against one another for points? Ho hum. So why does it deserve the number one ranking? Two words: Phil Moore.

Perhaps the greatest game show host in the history of game shows, Moore knew no equal. His classic early 90s wardrobe always matched the Japanese anime/rave décor of the set, and his classically manic dance moves, coupled with his scat (the jazz, not the porn) prowess made watching Nick Arcade a must. Just take a look at what I’m talking about here…

Remember when I said Legends had one of the hardest things for a 13-year old to accomplish? The end challenge of Nick Arcade was the hardest. Channeling their inner weatherman, children had to react to “video game” obstacles that came at them on a green screen. Remarkably complex, I might have seen it defeated once in my life. The producers could have listed the gold of Fort Knox as the prize, and still felt relatively confident that no one was coming close to getting their tiny hands on it.

Take a look...

And this was one of the easier final challenges!

Finally, this video, while not capturing the true essence that is Phil Moore, comes closer than anything else I can find. Enjoy...

So there you have it - unfortunately these are the best things I could find as examples of these shows...why youtube isn't peppered with more great clips of these shows I'll never know. Comments? Questions? Rants about the rankings? Give a shout in the comments.

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Podcast 8.00 Recap

Welcome back! After a hiatus lengthier than our normal hiatuses we tackle the topics most irregularly updated podcast/blog hybrids are afraid to tackle.
  • Ugly celebs that put blood in our dicks. And only our dicks.
  • Songs that make us want to drive too fast down the open highway with the windows down and a loaded Thompson machine gun on the passenger seat.
  • Dance and fashion tips from the locals that make the Media Inn a must-stop on any cross-country karaoke road trip.
  • As if we needed it, our egos swell a few sizes thanks to an awesome little movie that we made.
  • And we discuss a little-discussed show called Blost. Sorry, that was a typo (or was it?). I meant Lost (or did I?).
Here's the music featured in Musical Interlude and elsewhere. Couldn't find Two Cow Garage's "Make It Out Alive" anywhere, so I substituted.

Podcast 8.00

  1. 48 Hour Film Challenge
  2. National Film Challenge
  3. The Nectar of the Gods, LLC
  4. A karaoke virgin's experience at the Media Inn
  5. Here's ample debunking ammunition for the Lost theory we discussed. Some believe that Abbadon is a grown-up Walt. Compare the physiques of these 2 Nubian princes and tell me they could be the same person.
    1. Walt -
    2. Abbadon -
  1. The trailer I was remembering from one of my Musical Interludes:

  2. Sandra Bernhard gettting down with Tom Jones as they cover EMF. Hang in till the end when she fellates a the mike and you can pretty much see her pooper.

  3. One of my favorite Two Cow Garage songs.

  4. Jeff Fahey blows up Don Johnson's car.

  5. Jeff Fahey becomes The Lawnmower Man (with some help from Brosnan).

  6. Couldn't find any clips from Mr. Wrong, the erotic thriller with Pullman & Degeneres, so had to go with this.

  7. Corin Tucker of Sleater-Kinney (in the blue tank top and skirt) looks cute as a bug wearing a button.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Links of Interest 5/22

I think they got #1 right. And that's good. Not sure I'm thrilled with the Bridget Jones joke, but I'll forgive it. Not a lot of kung fu representation though.

After reading this, I love what Zappos is doing. Weeding out people who just need a job, they're looking for people who want to work there.

While reading this I went back and forth between who I thought was more ridiculous, the author or Disney. I'm still having a hard time making up my mind.

I will do everything possible to bring you updates of the R. Kelly trial, something that should be larger than the OJ Simpson trial.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

What would we do if aliens landed on Earth?

This is a "humorous" piece I wrote a few years ago, in hopes of it catapaulting me to fame. Yes, I'm that stupid. Anyway, please feel free to read it, or ignore it completely. I have no ability to force your hand.

It’s only a matter of time. It’s no longer a question of if, merely a question of when. As soon as that guy on Mars found all that water, preparations should have began. And yet I can find nothing. I’ve surfed around the web at least four times looking for anything that might be considered any sort of plan of attack, and I’m very disappointed with the lack of information I’ve found.

Earth is completely unprepared for an alien encounter.

Please, people out there prove me wrong. If you are a top-level government employee, perhaps even the president of a country, have access to a plan of this sort, and are reading this, drop me a line and assuage my fears. I promise I won’t tell anyone. Until I get that phone call however, I will operate under the assumption that no plan exists. And since there is a void, I have decided to use my expertise to help out. For a small fee and a personal hovercraft, I will offer my services to anyone who wants to know how to deal with a potential alien encounter. I also wouldn’t be opposed to either, "Commander of Galactic Affairs" or "The Han Solo of the Free Planet Earth," as a title, but we can work all that out later.

Why me? I’m glad you asked. I am aware my expertise may come into question, so I have gone ahead and made a list of credentials:
  1. I have seen a good number of science fiction movies, some involving aliens. From Independence Day to the one about the creatures that try to blow up the world, science fiction movies have a lot to offer.
  2. About 20 years ago, when I was a young lad growing up in the backwoods of the Philadelphia suburbs, I’m pretty sure I saw a UFO. My dad had decided to take my friend and me to the park, and when getting out of the car, my eye caught a shiny object in the afternoon sky. It appeared to be metallic and traveling faster than a car could, if a car was capable of flight. My first ten-year-old thought was that it was a plane, but that explanation was quickly scuttled when my friend, who also saw the object stated, "there is no way that is a plane." As he was ten at the time as well, and coincidentally shared the same birthday as myself, I considered him a suitable enough expert in the field of aeronautics, and took his opinion as fact.

Most of my other qualifications rely heavily on owning one of those cool pen telescopes you can buy at the Smithsonian Aerospace Museum and the occasional perusing of Time magazine, but I don’t want to bore you with anymore technical jargon.

I do realize there may be a few of you out there thinking that alien contact will be beneficial for the human race. I’m sure some of you will even think my ideas are a little "harsh," or "extreme," or "absurd," or better yet, "non-sensical." Well, you’re wrong. Aliens would like nothing more than to use our toes as garnishes to their alien martinis.
So go ahead and call me Space Nugent, or The Hunter S. Thompson of the Milky Way, but don’t come crying to me when you’re getting herded into the De-Boning Facility to be processed as a breakfast for Luron, the Space Lord of Nebula Greneth.

This is why my approach to aliens landing on Earth is similar to the popular strategy new inmates are told to adopt when going to prison. Kill the first guy you see and show everyone you ain’t takin' crap from no one. Once the aliens see we mean business, serious negotiations can begin – we can decide whether to initiate intergalactic glasnost or initiate the countdown to an ass whooping.

The following guidelines are to be used in the event of an alien encounter. Now, these should be treated as simply that – guidelines. They aren’t set in stone, since no one can predict the future. Except maybe The Amazing Kreskin. Only he’s getting pretty old, and unless aliens land in the next week or so I fear he will be dead before we can use his amazing powers. So until we have figured out how Kreskin does those crazy card tricks, or we decide to keep his brain alive in a jar somewhere, these guidelines are all we have. Here we go:

  1. Once aliens have landed on Earth, trust no one. Not your mom, not your best friend, not the whore you visit every Tuesday night. Assume alien beings are disguising themselves to look like the common housewife, or have the ability use some sort of space voodoo mind control to take over people’s bodies. If you don’t, it will only lead to confusion and the faux pa of telling embarrassing, personal stories not to your priest, but to a vile, blood sucking zombie creature that looks like your priest. Don’t let it happen. Err on the side of caution when coming in contact with anyone you suspect of being an alien in disguise with either vague pleasantries or a shotgun blast to the face.
  2. When first greeting the aliens, whether it is in your backyard or in the middle of the desert, blast them in the face with some oxygen when they first come down the ramp. Maybe we get lucky and the thing we need to survive will be the one thing that will kill them.
  3. Don’t send the President or any other people deemed important to the first alien meeting. I’m not suggesting rustling up hobos to go shake hands, but we definitely don’t want anyone there who makes the big decisions. Send a couple lab techs out there – people who can remember some basic instructions, but won’t be missed if the aliens decide they need to take some "specimens" back to the hive.
  4. If the negotiations start going downhill, give up Australia. Somehow it got continent status way back when, so the aliens will think it’s somehow "important" to us and that we’ll "care what happens" to it. If that’s not enough, throw in Scandinavia. Stupid fjords.
  5. Remember – objectivity is the key when dealing with aliens. No type of alien – neither the scaly eight-foot tall, toothy face-suckers, nor the cute, poofy-looking ones that want to cuddle can be trusted when it comes to this type of meeting. Sorry ET, you’re not fooling me. Sure, your stomach lights up and you’ve got big eyes, but behind that lovable exterior lies something dark. Why did you come to Earth? Why didn’t your pals come back for you once they saw your empty seat in the spaceship? Why did you get so attached to a nine-year-old kid?
  6. Set up a resistance group right away, regardless of what you think the aliens’ supposed intentions are. One day they’re your best friend, the next they’re stomping puppies and eating all our ice cream. Don’t get bamboozled! I’d much rather be a part of an Earth resistance group fighting against these potential overlords than getting hoodwinked because we believed the "we’re so far advanced war, is extinct" rhetoric they were spewing. Marc Singer got it right. If aliens show up on Earth, it’s most likely because they need something. And they don’t like to ask. Besides, isn’t being in the resistance just plain cooler? On the off chance you actually defeat the aliens, two words – mucho sex. Plus, you know all the hippies gravitate toward resistance groups. All the good strains of the Mary Jane are gonna be flowing through your hideaway! Resistance Group = primo weed.

Am I overreacting? It’s quite possible. Am I crazy? I think we all know the answer to that. But I hope I’ve opened your eyes at least a little to the possible danger lurking out there in the cosmos. If we’re not careful the world is going to get caught with its pants down, and that’s no way to greet an alien race. Sure, nothing would be greater if aliens came down and we all got along like the Care Bears. I’m just worried that the Care Bears scenario is too fictional. Because we live in a non-Care Bear world. Aliens could come anytime, from anywhere, and for any reason. War…peace…a rest stop on the galactic highway…anything. It’s why I carry a sock full of lye wherever I go. As my crazy moon shining uncle used to say, "A poor man’s shotgun is just as good as the real thing."

And I can’t think of a better reason to carry that sock today other than to defend my universal freedoms and melt the face off of some nasty alien.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Links of Interest 5/20

New Batman trailer! Looks like they're really setting up the third one nicely (I won't go into my musings as they might be considered spoilerish). Definitely looks dark too...really dark. Love teh last line of this trailer too. I predict at least a $10 million opening day take for this one.

My favorite Atari 2600 video game growing up? Probably Raiders of the Lost Ark. Extremely difficult for this young lad, I felt like I really accomplished something when I got the ark. What does that have to do with this article about crappy video games based on great films? Pretty much nothing.

The description is way better than the payoff of this one. Seriously, is it too much to ask to get a decent cameraman when you're pulling off a stunt like this? I will say I enjoyed the one guy vaguely dressed like Sean Connery's character muttering, "Godspeed." Other than that, a little underwhelming. Still cool to see what 5 million Lego pieces look like all pieced together.

Well, I love time travel. So, even though it hurts a lot when I think about the paradoxes it would create, I'll still link to anything about it, including this essay.

Monday, May 19, 2008

Links of Interest 5/19

Ok, so I chuckled at some of these responses to get out of jury duty for the R. Kelly case, but isn't this a slippery slope we're creating in society? Hey, no one likes jury duty, but isn't our responsibility? To make up stupid excuses to get out of it only belittles our jury based system, which in turn hurts us all. We shouldn't be allowed to complain about the system if we're not willing to take part in it when required. Ok, that's enough sermonizing.

This link is making the Internet rounds, so I figured I would add. While I disagree with the ranking of the top 21, I'm pretty sure they at least got the right group. Strange that two of them may or may not have committed their crimes in a coal mine.

I'm sure that if the private sector is tracking us by our cell phones, than the government has been doing it for much longer, and have much more nefarious devices and technology in place by now to keep us all in check.

I loved (and still do) Arrested Development, so I'm cautiously optimistic about this new series. Not thrilled it's a cartoon (I'm just not much of a cartoon guy) but I'll still give it the benefit of the doubt.

Where to begin? Point Break holds a special place in my heart. Yes, I know it's silly, implausible, ludicrous, and nonsensical, but it has it's charm. News of a sequel hits me with dread though. Sure, a good sequel can be made, but Hollywood doesn't seem to want to spend money to ensure these things, especially for movies made 15 years prior. While I have hopes since they mention Bodhi, (which suggests they at least have the first movie in their minds), I'm not sure how I feel about the rest of this article. I only can hope they play it straight, and don't give us another Roadhouse 2 (which does have one of the greatest lines uttered in movie history; sadly that doesn't make up for the rest of it).

Friday, May 16, 2008

Thoughts on Lost - "There's No Place Like Home"

Ok, here are a few thoughts about the show last night, the show in general and an updated list of who I would be hanging out with on the Island. Please feel free to discuss whatever in the comments section.

First, I direct you to the Entertainment Weekly recap of this week's episode. While heavy on inferences and outside references, it does a good job of linking actions to past episodes that you might have forgotten.

As for last night's episode, I'm not a huge fan of the direction they’re taking the finale. Right now, I'm done with the Oceanic 6. I've always hated Hurley, Sun isn't much better, Kate and Jack are getting annoying, and taking a baby along for that ride, and we've kinda already seen where Sayid is gonna wind up. I want more Ben and Kemy. Hopefully we get it in 2 weeks, but with the way they’ve set up the Oceanic 6 (they’re as spread out as they could possibly be in the Lost geography) it’s going to take a lot of storytelling to get them all back together and in the hull of an airplane.

A couple of random thoughts/theories of mine about the island:

* How the hell did Faraday have the orchid drawn in his notebook without being there?

* Abbadon = Walt grown up? – popular theory on the web. Not sure I necessarily agree with it, unless they explain that aging weirdly on the island also gives you a bizarre accent.

* The “crash” site of the plane they keep saying was a hoax? Not really a hoax. I think they’re all dead in another timeline. (read below).

* Moving the island means moving it somewhere in time.

* Jack Shepherd is not dead.

The orchid station has a cool video, which we've linked to before here.

Current list of people I want to be close to on the Island right now. I define this list as who I’d currently want to be with on or near the island, to increase my chances of survival (and feel good about my survival.):

10. Jack – He does something he’s not proud of I bet. Something that is going to be eating at his conscious. Still, he’s got a sense of loyalty that won’t quit.
9. Locke – He might be the savior of something, but that doesn’t mean he has any clue what he’s doing. In fact, it always seems he’s going against what he should be doing. Of course, right now he’s positioned as a savior, so it wouldn’t be a terrible place to be by his side.
8. Kate – She’s a survivor, no matter what. And she’s easy to look at.
7. Desmond – Glad to hear his decision about not going back to the island. You can get killed there just for looking at a tree funny. Not so happy to see he’s on a soon-to-be-exploding freighter. That doesn’t bode well. Kinda get the vibe when Faraday gets back, Jin is going to put Sun on the raft to go back to the island, and he’s going to stay with all those other survivors (you know, the ones that we never saw before that suddenly got to escape) and Desmond as the Freighter explodes once they kill Kemy – that thing on his bicep has to be involved here. My suspicion? We all think Desmond dies in the finale but he’ll wind up alive in the next season. Ok, that’s more my hope than anything else.
6. Sawyer – Like Kate, he’s a survivor. So far, he seems to be picking the right sides, which makes him smarter than Jack. How much smarter, I don’t know.
5. Sayid – Well, we know he survives into the future, we just don’t know how. He’s running off into the wild to get Jack…not sure why he’s loyal to Jack. Perhaps he’s been with Ben since the beginning and is a mole? There are a lot of earlier connections to Sayid and the island (that army guy that sees him Iraq and then winds up in the hatch when desmond gets there? Hmmmm?
4. Faraday – Talk about secrets. I don’t think he’s keeping them because, I think he’s actually keeping them from himself. As in future Faraday has left clues for past Faraday that present Faraday is slowly starting to pick up? Yeah, I can’t follow that either. That notebook of his contains some powerful things though.
3. Kemy – Yes I know I suggested earlier that he will probably die, but still – he’s a badass and apparently has intel that gives him a leg up on most of the people on the island. And he came out of a scrap with the smoke monster fairly unscathed. And he does at least go into a firefight with a decent bargaining chip (the device I believe will blow up the boat if he’s killed.) There are worse people to be near when SGD.
2. Alpert – He never ages. That’s kinda cool. He’s always one step ahead of people when we see him. That’s really kinda cool. And he apparently knows a place on the island that others don’t, where he can kinda chill out, not age and probably bang chicks. And that’s the coolest.
1. Ben – How can it not be? He said it last night. He has a plan for everything. Sure, he got his daughter killed, but aside from that, when hasn’t be been in control of the situation. I don’t like his tactic of allowing people to beat him up to make them feel like they have the drop on him, but it’s better than being a corpse.

And finally, here's my bizarre totally not thought out theory about the island that makes my head hurt...

I see the island as a place that sits at the edge of time travel. With the island you can travel through time , which is basically a different dimension. Each time you travel, you start a different strand which becomes your timeline. These strands eventually come back tog

Lets consider our “present” as a cord of rope. Now, with the island one can travel within time. But once they do, it splinters off and becomes a different stand of rope (one of the strands that make up the rope). It remains to be seen whether these strands go off into nowhere; I believe they eventually must come back together to keep the large cord of rope as one. That then means while one may be able to manipulate certain events in the past, the overall constant cannot be changed. Or perhaps the island can change events in the future, and that’s why it’s so dangerous to move it. Regardless, that’s why I think these characters are so intertwined with their pasts. I think they know each other in the future, and that when they travel back in the past, their consciousness retains this information, so that they will still all come together so as not to ruin the time structure of the cord of rope.

Could you imagine seasons 3 and 4 the same episodes as the first two season just from a different perspective? Or maybe that’s just the series finale.

I won’t even pretend to think I understand what I just wrote. It’s obviously thrown together without a lot of thought.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Links of Interest 5/15

I love top secret places. I'm not sure why, because I'm never going to be able to see them ever (I doubt I'm going to get high lever security clearance anytime soon). Here's a list of top secret bases. No mention of the weird building close to the banks of Lake Cayuga where albino deer ran the fence perimeter.

I always thought there was a book in failed movie scripts from Hollywood. Take for example, Superman. That movie had a bunch of rewrites and different people attached to it. Now that it's been filmed, wouldn't it be interesting to see what it could have been? I'd also like to see what some of these failed movies could have been.

People cursing on live television is funny. I won't pretend to explain it, but it is.

I have taken on a "no spoiler" attitude for this season and future seasons of Lost. It's been tough, but I've been relatively pure for each episode. And since this season has been batshit insane (in a good way) it's been that much more surprising. So I haven't clicked on these videos, but I also don't behoove anyone to spoil things for themselves. You've been efficiently warned.

1 in 10? I've gambled on much smaller maybe those student loans don't have to be paid off so fast.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Links of Interest 5/14

Can Beck be considered underrated? Probably not with the critics, but I don't think he gets the credit he deserves with the buying public. And that's a shame, because I can't think of too many artists out there right now to rival him. So you can imagine how excited I am to hear his new album might be coming out in June.

What kind of idea is this. I remember being horrified when I saw 'Bad Lieutenant." But that doesn't mean I didn't respect it. For lines to be crossed, there are few that come close to this one. And now they're remaking it. Are they going to water it down? Because if so, then what's the point really?

It probably says a lot about who you are if you're known for "bathing in blood." And I'm not even sure that's the worst of this list! I do like the fact that neither the Taliban nor Al Qaeda are on this list. I guess they might be considered terrorist groups and not gangs, but where's the line that divides the two? And I'm guessing it's a minor quibble to try and classify these groups in either of those two.

So the National Archives over in Great Britain decided to start releasing its records on UFOs. So far, it seems like all it is is a bunch of stories from people out in the country talking about how they were abducted. Hey, if I wanted that I would rent Communion.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Links of Interest 5/12

It's like finding out there's no Santa Claus, if Santa Claus were a giant waterfall. Seriously, do we as a society demand that nature be controlled for our enjoyment? I'd rather see how the Falls act within the different climates, different seasons, etc. But no, people "in the know" are making decisions for me.

I am fascinated by Antarctica. Yes, I know I'm in the minority, but I love cold weather, and I think I paint the concept of isolation and desolation as romantic. Yes, I know that makes me bizarre and probably mentally unstable, but what can I say? Of course, let me make something clear - I couldn't live there indefinitely. A nice vacation is all I'm asking. Is that even possible?

I don't promote breaking the law, but if you do, maybe something like this can help you.

Chris Anderson was like a comet in the NBA. A drug fueled comet. While this article doesn't go into detail about his suspension, it does unfortunately paint a picture about the (now)non-existent relationship he has with his mother.

Remember that old page where someone graded children's drawings? Yes, very funny - this page has nothing to do with that, other than it begins with children's drawings as an inspiration. But instead of tearing them down, it fleshes them out and adds skill and maturity to the boundless imagination.

Friday, May 9, 2008

Links of Interest 5/9

This is the worst news I could have possibly today. A new Gong Show? Don't network execs realize the magic formula of the original Gong Show? The reason to watch it was awesome celebrity judges and Chuck Barris' manic, coke-fueled ramblings.
Seriously. It certainly wasn't for the talent. Even the winners stunk. If there was any show out there that was greatly assisted by free flowing drugs, it was this one.

I'll always link to cool pics of stuff on this big blue marble.

Remember, support the artists that take risks.

I offer this only because I can't believe someone is getting paid to write something like this and have it published in a major publication like O. Then again, I'm not a woman (obviously the magazine's and articles target) and so I admit maybe I just don't get it. Still, I find it fascinating.

As a child, I loved my Atari 2600. In fact, even in recent years I've played a bunch. I'm pretty sure I can't be beat in Plaque Attack or Megamania. Sadly, this article explains why Atari is no longer around. Bet they're kicking themselves for not partnering with a little company called Nintendo.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

Analysis...The Strange Tale of a Wrestlers’ Symposium Gone All Emotional

I’m not about to pretend I found this video, or even that this video is anything new. I realize it’s been played on numerous morning radio shows around the country (I heard it first on Opie & Anthony) and it has been mined almost dry of its humor.

Notice I say almost.

Because, I believe there is something that we’ve all overlooked in this video, and I want to quickly point out it’s brilliance, and possibly redirect some of the humiliation that has fallen on professional wrestling’s number 1 fan.

Take a look at the video, and analysis, after the jump…

Ok, for those of you who haven’t seen this yet, please take a moment and watch this clip.

Now, I wasn’t in that high-school gym to hear this symposium on professional wrestling. (Had I been able to make it, you can bet I would have been hanging out with that guy lounging on the bleachers behind the wrestlers. Sure, I wouldn’t be able to see their fronts, but I’d have a lot more leg room.) So it’s possible that the man’s response was due to a particularly serious plea from Terry Funk (the man that gave barbed wire manufacturers a reason to stay in business in the late 90s) to regulate wrestling.

Or, the guy could be a little unbalanced.

But enough humiliation has been wrought upon the crying man. I’d like you all to turn your attention to the 13 second mark of the clip, right as the tearful response is getting revved up. Before the cascade of tears fall, an arm from the left side of the screen comes over, reassuringly to pat the man on the back.


In these modern times, it is not crazy to think it is the man’s boyfriend. In fact, if that were the case, it would render the subtle move entirely un-creepy. However, I don’t believe that to be the case, as if they were a couple, wouldn’t they be sitting closer together?

No, I contend that this was a stranger, simply reacting to a spontaneous moment, and in a charitable act, reached out to give this man a the only thing he felt he could, which was a pat on the back.

With all that said, I now ask you, which action is worse? The emotional, passionate outburst of a man who REALLY enjoys professional wrestling, or the pat on the back from an anonymous person sitting next to you in a high school gym listening to wrestlers’ tales of woe on the circuit?

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Links of Interest 5/1

If you can make it as a sandwich in New York, you can make it anywhere!

I'm not sure if I should excited that stuff like this can happen in a free society such as ours, or frightened...and I'm really not sure I could live with a lot of people pro-Ron Paul. I'm a little creeped out by the proliferation of Ron Paul signs around my town.

Honestly, other than Icebox, are any of these choices pop culture zeitgeist?

Fugu. It's the poison blowfish that people who don't jump out of planes eat to get that death rush. Take, for example, the author of this story.