NFL Picks Week #8 (Cline) - I Miss Buck Belue

As some of you know, both Goose & I have been involved with short film competitions in the last few years. Along with several other idiots (Nectar of the Gods), we have done pretty well. The gist is that you have a short period of time (24-72 hours) to write, film, score, & edit a short (4-8 minutes usually) movie.

This weekend, we'll be doing our 5th National Film Challenge. Tonight at 7 we'll receive 2 Genres (we have to choose one), a Prop, a Line of Dialogue, and a Character from the NFC. They do this to minimize how much writing & filming teams can do ahead of time.

We then have until Monday night to finish the movie. It will be a bit more challenging because we'll be doing it without our primary editor (J-Hawk) for the first time since our inaugural NFC effort.

As much as we love doing these competitions, there's always something that annoys us.  Find out what it is after the leap...

Usually it's the guy who runs the NFC, Doug Whyte.  Almost always, it's Doug Whyte.  For the second year in a row, we've gotten one of the same Genres we got the year before.  In 2006 & 2007 one of the Genres we were given was Holiday Film (WARNING: NOT AN ACTUAL GENRE).  In 2007 & 2008 we got Romance. 

There's 2 possible explanations for this:

1. Doug Whyte's incompetent.  How hard would it be to maintain a simple Excel spreadsheet tracking each team's genres over the years?  There's ~150 teams that enter each year, and only a subset of those are holdovers.  I'm not saying that we have to cycle our way through every single genre before getting a repeat.  I don't think, however, it's too much to ask to make sure that a team doesn't get the same Genre 2 years in a row.  Mostly, we just want to explore doing different genres.  Because we do great drama. 
   
2. Doug Whyte hates us.  This is more plausible AND more entertaining.  It *may* have stemmed from the film festival we went to back in 2005 when we won the NFC Audience Award and I called him a cock-tease.  Which isn't my fault, because there was an open bar.  And he was being a cock-tease.  Also, smashing the award as part of our film last year probably didn't help either.

Anyway, I won't give away too much of the plot, but here are the elements we were given this year:

Genres: Romance or Horror
Character: Jamie Walsh, Clerk
Prop: Fly Swatter
Line of Dialogue: And what have we learned from this?

We did opt to go with horror, and we almost did a movie where the big reveal was that the fly swatter was the killer.  Also, we animated the fly swatter and gave it googly eyes and an awesome voiceover.

We're about halfway through the filming and we're pretty optimistic about how it's going to turn out.

Helping us last night was the rain delay of the Phillies game, because once that started, we were pretty much done.

It was an entertaining game, especially towards the end.  A couple of observations:

1. I want to see a PPV MMA bout between McCarver & Buck.  Winner gets to blow Upton first.  Upton's good, but c'mon.
2. The guy behind the plate with the red face paint and sunglasses was awesome. And not creepy in the least.
   
3. The signs were, at best, boring and, at worst gay (there was one invoking the Playoff Fairy) or a rip-off (I saw a "You Gotta Believe").
4. If Joe  Maddon sees a guy skulking around his house in the off-season muttering things about a 5-man infield and peeking through his windows, it's probably Goose.  If Maddon drops the 6-man infield in Game 4, Goose will be waiting outside the locker room with lube and a ball gag.
5. It's a tough, split-second call, but Longoria should've let the ball go.  There's a better chance it would've had enough momentum to get to the line and roll foul than he had to throw out Dan Haggerty at the plate.
6. At one point a guy in the stands right behind home plate walked to his seat while the pitcher had the ball and was about to throw.  Really? The ushers at the 300 level in Citizen's Bank Ballpark will physically block you from going to your seat at that point.  But it's cool for the a-hole 20 feet behind the catcher can walk to his seat.  I hope his Blackberry ear phone gives him ear cancer.
   

This probably won't last too long (stupid MLB), but here are the last 9 minutes of the game including McCarver's horrible use of the telestrator, the 5-man infield, and some awesome techno music (seriously?).

And some hot co-eds live-vlog the game.  The scary thing is that I'd rather listen to them than McCarver & Buck.

Now on to my picks (in CAPS) for Week 7 in the league where they play...

...FOR PAY!

Week 7 Records:

Cline -- 9-5 (+$260) (LOTW/BDCS -- 1-1)
Goose -- 9-5 (+$260)


Overall Records:

Cline -- 41-29-1 (.586) +$490 (LOTW/BDCS -- 3-5)
Goose -- 39-31-1 (.557) +$90

Oakland at BALTIMORE(-2.5)


Why don't owners like Jones & Davis just say screw it, I'M THE COACH!  Hell, it worked for Ted Turner.

Arizona at CAROLINA (-1)

I don't know what to think about Carolina, but I still can't take the Cardinals on the road.  In related news, I'm not happy that Boldin is back.  My fantasy team needs Steve "The Breast" (pronounced "BREEST") Breaston to resume his rightful place in the starting line up.

Tampa Bay (-1) at DALLAS

I still think Tampa stinks despite their record, and Dallas has to bounce back after the Rams debacle last week, right?

Right?

WASHINGTON (-9) at Detroit

Unless the spread is 20 points or more, I'm pretty much going to be going against Detroit, Kansas City, and Cincy the rest of the way. Unless they play each other, then I'm flipping a coin.

Buffalo (-5) at MIAMI



I don't like too many of the underdogs this week, so this will have to do.  I'm still not sold on Buffalo, mainly because I haven't seen one of their plays, even in a highlight.  That's good enough for me to find another awkward picture of humans and big dogs interacting.

St. Louis at NEW ENGLAND(-2.5)

One of plans the rest of the year is to take New England against not-good teams, especially at home.  My other plan (stolen from Shane) involves hiding nuts that squirrels have buried in my yard.  Later in the winter when it's really cold and they're really hungry, they'll return to the hiding place and be shocked to see that the nuts aren't there any more.  That's when I sell the nuts back to the squirrels at a 20% markup. Genius.

SAN DIEGO (-1.5) at New Orleans

It's in London. Whee...

Could the NFL screw over New Orleans any more? First they lost a home game (and the Giants got an extra one) because of Katrina.  Now they lose another one because of this farce.

I mean, the Saints fans don't deserve this.  They are loyal and passionate.  And fricking hot (NSFW).

Atlanta at PHILLY(-6)

Eagles @1, Phillies/Rays @8, "The Who" (tribute band?) @8.  By the time Game 4 starts tonight, the stadium parking lots should be a puke water park.  There's gonna be a lot of Foster Brooks impersonators down there tonight.  This will make a Dallas MNF game look like a game night at AA.  Also, parking should be fun.

Kansas City at N.Y. JETS (-10)

See above for my Detroit/KC/Cincy theorem.

Cleveland at JACKSONVILLE (-1.5)

If you ever want to play pool for free in Jacksonville, I know a guy who knows a guy.

Cincinnati at HOUSTON (-5.5)

See above for my Detroit/KC/Cincy theorem.

N.Y. GIANTS at Pittsburgh (PICK)

I'll be honest. I have no clue. 

Seattle at SAN FRANCISCO (-4.5)

Seattle loses here and they join the Tripod of Terrible (Detroit/KC/Cincy) to form the Fetid Foursome.

Indianapolis at TENNESSEE (-4)

Indy crushed the poor man's Titans (the Ravens) at home.  But this is on the road against the upper middle class man's Ravens.