Friday, November 14, 2008

Week 11 NFL Picks With Cline -- I Miss Nia Peeples

So this week is much less crazy than last week. Oddly, I did end up in a Harlem jazz club again last night. I'm not sure how that happened.

As for the cheating accusations being rampantly hurled my way by Goose, I won't even stoop to his level. I will say that he's a jerk.

In other news, all the rumors you've heard about The Popcorn Trick podcast will be back on the air shortly. We've reached the stage where we pick a date & time and then one of us cancels. Just like the old times...

I will actually have a theme this week for my picks. Among the artists The Popcorn Trick unilaterally endorses and supports is Girl Talk. GT is basically one guy, Gregg Gillis, who has put out multiple albums mashing up dozens of songs from all pop genres into something I don't hesitate to call art. Though the real trick he's pulled off is somehow not being sued. In a world where Cypress Hill gets sued for $29 mil and the Verve make no money for Bittersweet Symphony, this guy should be offering handies outside of law schools to get help with the hundreds of lawsuits he's dealing with. But he's not.

And this has inspired similar-minded fans to create video mash-ups using the original videos for the song elements he uses and put them on YouTube. I have to give particular props to YouTube user Bunny Greenhouse who was by far the best of the bunch I saw. He not only seamlessly switched back & forth between the videos, he even "inserted" people from one video into another.

I've seen Girl Talk three times live, and the first was by far the best. It was a the Montreal Jazz Fest in the summer of 2007. Didn't know much about him other than a shout-out on Goose's best albums of 2006. I scalped my way into a sold out show, found a crevice in which to boogie and sweated my ass off. As the show ended, Gillis led us out of the club (spinning tunes the whole time) around the corner to an abandoned lot where he passed out sparklers and the dancing continued. The other 2 times I saw him was in Philly which were good, but there were way too many teenagers out of the house for the first time, drunk on parking lot box wine, and taking pictures of how crazy they were being. With that warning in mind, allow me to pimp a show they're playing 11/29 in Atlantic City. I'll be out of town, but it could be somewhere that is nowhere near the hook region.

So each game's picks will have a tie to a Girl Talk video, though most will be tenuous in the extreme. Enjoy.

Now onto Week 11 in the league where they play... FOR PAY!

Week 10 Records:
Cline -- 9-5 (+$260) (LOTW=W -- BDCS=W)
Goose -- 9-5 (+$260)

Overall Records:
Cline -- 66-46-1 (.589) +$870 (LOTW=5-2 -- BDCS=3-4)
Goose -- 63-49-1 (.563) +$270

As always, my picks are in CAPS:


As far as I can tell, this exciting game was as fake as the moon landing.

As fake as Mr. Gillis' threats against people who do YouTube video mash-ups:


DENVER at Atlanta (-6)

This is similar to picks I've made earlier in the season where a team is getting an inordinate amount of pub and congrats for how well they're doing. Guys start reading their own press clippings and get smug about the increased level of trim they're pulling.

Atlanta comes down to earth this week. They can only push it so far before they end up on lithium.

PHILADELPHIA (-9.5) at Cincinnati

That was the first time in a while I've listened to an entire MNF game. When did Madden stop taking his meds? My girlfriend watch with bemused amusement as I kept a running dialogue responding to every inane thing he said. The worst was when he first said that Reid "had to challenge" the play where Jacobs was clearly down before the ball came out near the end of the game. Then 2 minutes later he said it was a desperation move and a mistake. Make up your mind.

I've always defended McNabb as better than we give him credit for, but the more I watch him this year, it's painfully obvious he's not a great QB. Even when he's healthy. Great QBs don't habitually start the game looking like Gary Hogeboom and they aren't gassed in the 4th quarter after a 10 yard scramble.

All that being said, I still like them to bust out against a bad Bengals team, temporarily raising hopes before dashing them again.

I've got no Girl Talk verbiage for this one. Just a compilation of clips & pics from GT shows:


This game's gonna be ugly but entertaining. Kinda like this low-tech take on Girl Talk:

Houston at INDIANAPOLIS (-9)

Christ, that's a lot of points for the Colts to give up considering they haven't been brilliant that much and Houston can score some points. This just feels like a 10 point win for Indy.

You know what it is? My mama always said, "I don't want to wait for an umbrella at the bottom of a wishing well." True.

NEW ORLEANS (-5) at Kansas City

I know KC's been frisky recently (I credit my Tripod graphic for inspiring them), and I don't have a handle on New Orleans, but I think KC shot their wad last week in a moral victory against San Diego.

Kinda like that young turk Ray J did with Kardashian back when she was his girlfriend.

Oakland at MIAMI (-10.5)

I know Oakland's gonna cover some games the rest of the year as the spreads start inflating, but I can't take them on the road against the Fins.

I imagine that the thought processes that go through Al Davis' head are just like fans at a GT show. They are numerous, hyperactive, and goofily non-productive.

Baltimore at N.Y. GIANTS (-6.5)

As good as the Giants looked running the ball against the Eagles last week, they still were 1 decent 2-minute drill away from losing that game. Fortunately they were up against the anti-masters of the 2-minute drill.

Joe Flacco, the Ravens rookie QB, played at Delaware. I almost saw PM Dawn in Delaware once. That's the connection.

Minnesota at TAMPA BAY (-3.5)

Great, the week I decide to do something thematic with each game, is the one where we're back to 16 games on the schedule. If this were Week 10, I'd be done by now.

Ooh child, that's a bittersweet intro.

DETROIT at Carolina (-14)

As Carolina proved last week against a terrible team, they're not going to blow anyone out. So I'm casting my lot with Detroit. Yay.

What does this video have to do with Girl Talk? It came up during a YouTube search for it. Don't ask me why.

St. Louis at SAN FRANCISCO (-6)

Yeesh. The "winner" of this game gets to crow about being 3-7.

Talk about a battle of who could care less. This is why I've led an independent, good life, free of real monetary gambling. Otherwise this game would be going down and I'd have to care about not having any money in the bank if the Niners can't cover this spread.

ARIZONA (-3) at Seattle

Arizona let me down last week, but I think they bounce back against an aggressively mediocre Seattle team.

Man, has Warner's career really come back to life this season? He was way down in it but now his career is upside down again and he's a superstar.

Tennessee (-3) at JACKSONVILLE

This game's always a war. As well as Tennessee's played, they just had a slugfest with Chicago, so I'll take the home team getting points.

Oh, it's about time for Garrard to start finding a connection with Jones-Drew out of the backfield. He's hits hose linebackers like a cannonball.

San Diego at PITTSBURGH (-4.5)

I think it's about time that we recognize that San Diego's just not that good.

If they were gonna be starting something, they should not have waited until their win total was so low. On Sunday morning when they're getting ready for the game, they should realize that the numbers are against them and it's just they way they are.

DALLAS (-1.5) at Washington

How many times will I believe in Dallas? How many times will I think they're still an elite team? How many times will I wager that they can lay points against a good team and bitter rival on the road? Once more.

Over/under on shots of Romo's pretty woman during this war Sunday night? 17.5

MONDAY: CLEVELAND at Buffalo (-5)

The other time Cleveland stepped up this year was a night game. I think they do it again.

As a reward for getting this far, I'll leave you with the entire NYE set Girl Talk did in Chicago last year. And I'll even spare you the bad plays on words.


khop said...

"As for the cheating accusations being rampantly hurled my way by Goose, I won't even stoop to his level. I will say that he's a jerk."

For the most part, I'm going to stay out of this, especially since I think Cline hustled me a little when proposing an over/under on how many times Madden started a comment with the phrase, "Talk about..." or similar. (He proposed 24.5 for the entire game after going on a 5 minute diatribe that "verbal tic" was a pathetic euphemism for what was probably a mild form of tourette's. Needless to say I picked the over, and not only had to then spend the game counting them, but will be doing dishes next time we eat dinner in, because it didn't even come close. Well played....) HOWever, I can verify that picks were made and in the process of being posted well in advance of the Sunday games beginning that day.

Goose said... it was easy to cherry pick my picks, throw a few opposite side ones in games where the line was really close, and still maintain a lead. At least that's theory I'm working on.

Goose said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
khop said...

ah, well if you guys didn't formalize a process that would prevent that, then you both are on your own.

Now then. Resume the hurlting of insults and accusations!

Goose said...

Thank you - you have just confirmed my suspicions.

And I can't believe you would take his side. Think about that when you're doing his dishes. And never play Apples 2 Apples with him. Though I have a long list of people not to play Apples 2 Apples with, so that might not mean much.

Cline said...

If the upshot of all this is that I never have to play Apples 2 Apples again because everyone now knows that I cheat, I'm fine saying that I'm a cheater.

Goose said...

hmmm...I can't allow that to happen...

khop said...

A. don't misread me, it's not that I'm saying that he did, in fact, do that. It's just if the loop hole for it wasn't closed, then it's all fair in love and gambling...

B. what can i say, he's good in bed.

Cline said...

To be fair, it's mostly the footboard.

Goose said...

So you're definitely saying he did that? Wow, before I was kidding, but now I appreciate your candidness. Well, some of your candidness.

khop said...

No, i have zero knowledge of anything of the sort! I was just pointing out that if an agreement wasn't made ahead of time preventing either of you from peeking at the other's picks and having such peeping tommery guide your own picks, than, sure, it would be douchey, but not technically breaking the rules of the bet.

Regarding the uber-candor, I'm realizing it is a distinct side effect from dating Cline. That, and all the itching.

What, too much?

Goose said...

too much? Please, you haven't heard the podcast yet.

Anonymous said...

So after a week of posting the real lines I have not come to any conclusions about the difference it would make in your picks. The idea is that if you have real bookie-made lines, you'll be more likely to have different picks because the lines should roughly warrant 50/50 money on it each way. When you have 3-4 bogus lines that are skewed 3-5 points, you both should be on the side where there is obvious value, regardless of whether that ends up a win or not. For example, if the Eagles were 3 point favorites this past weekend, i'm sure you both would have taken them instead of Cline taking PHI and Goose taking CIN, while in either scenario CIN would cover. The only non-real line was GB/CHI even since there wasn't a line out by wed morning, and both took GB, when real line was 3.5. That may or may not have mattered.

Anyway you took 11 same picks, and 5 different ones, which is a little more similarity than i would suspect in randomness, but probably less overlap than one who was obviously aping the picks of the other contestant. I don't know how that compares to other weeks as far as overlap (i've already wasted enough time on this today...), so i'll offer you this weeks lines to keep a control environment for your Cline Conspiracy theory...

Thursday 11/20
CIN @ PITT -10.5

Sunday 11/23
PHI @ BAL -1
HOU @ CLE -3
SF @ DAL -10
MIN @ JAX -1
BUFF -3 @ KC
New ENG @ MIA -1
CHI -9 @ STL
NY Jets @ TENN -5
OAK @ DEN -9.5
NY Giants -3 @ ARIZ
WASH -3.5 @ SEA
CAR @ ATL -1
IND @ San Diego -1
GB @ New Orleans -1

Lot of tight lines this week...good luck to you both.