Monday, November 3, 2008

Going "inside" The Popcorn Trick

I'm not sure many of you know this, but with this blog comes a neat little tool that allows me to see people search on Google to get here. When I first found out about this interface, I was really psyched, in a Porky's girl's bathroom hole scene. Now that I've peeped on you freaks though, it's more of an James Gandolfini 8MM feel that I can't wash off my skin, no matter how many Silkwood showers I take.

(and there it is - the record for obscure, stupid movie references in one paragraph. I'd like to thank the academy. I have a speech already here...)

Anyway, while I'm sure many bloggers use this data to increase the traffic to their site, I use it for entertainment value. And I figured why should I have the fun? Why not pull the curtain away and reveal what makes you convicts tick? Because after seeing most of the phrases that get you here, I can't imagine anyone other than the fine people locked away in our penal system searching our site.

On the flip side, a closer look at the stats, and a list of my favorite phrases that led people to the Popcorn Trick...

It seems that the search engine tool only keeps data from 6 months, and it's broken down into 2 lists: a list of searches where our site showed up (and it's ranking on that list); and a list of searches where people then clicked to our site. I'll be focusing on the latter...

May 2008

If you googled "live blogging the lost finale," we ranked #2! That's pretty cool. I can't believe I was one of the only ones to do that, but I'll take it. And yes, I'm still upset Kemy died.

The search I'm most proud of this month is: "youtube majors lee benedict dirk." I feel good knowing I've spread the genius of both those actors, regardless of the fact that the person searching for them isn't 100% sure of first land last names for these two stud actors.

I'm also proud the phrase, "Little Giants 2" brought at least one person to the site, though I'm sad that we didn't give any actual information about the sequel. Actually I'm really sad that there isn't a sequel.

June 2008

Either the thing was broken this month, or our content was a little lean. No searches led anyone to our site. It was like the book A Tale of 2 Cities, with our site being the city that really sucked.

July 2008

We bounced back in July though. Here's a list of my favorites:

What will the government do if a UFO landed on earth
Little Giants 2
dick in the popcorn trick

Good to see the fan of Little Giants didn't give up hope for the sequel! I also like the fact that my site hopefully further fueled some conspiracy newsletter's editor with more fodder to pour into the gullible minded hearts of its subscribers.

dick in the popcorn trick - well that just brings a warm spot to my heart.

August 2008

We lost steam again in August, with the only thing bringing people to our site was our name: The Popcorn Trick. Hey, it's the dog days of summer.

September 2008

People are back in school which brings more bizarre searches. I'd personally like to thank the person who used the phrase, "Adrienne Barbeau's jiggle" to get to the site; to see that come up puts a smile on my face and a lump in my pants. In fact, it also made me come up with this quick list of ten other women/physical movements:

  • Fannie Flagg shimmy
  • Linda Carter chicken dance
  • evangeline lilly fidget
  • bridget fonda nipple lick
  • jane fonda watches bridget nipple lick
  • Jill clayburgh silver streak
  • kristy mcnichol sexy gran mal seizure
  • tina yothers hair pulling
  • heather thomas bouncing buttocks
  • denise richards kissing things

I am concerned however that someone searched for "how to do the popcorn trick." Not because I'm afraid it's going to happen in a movie somewhere, more because it never occurred to me that the move needed instructions. Basically you need a tub of popcorn, a somewhat loose girl who can take a really obvious hint, and some moxie. There, I just laid it out for you.

October 2008

I may hate the Braves, but I don't hate the person finding us through "Mark Lemke girlfriends." I so hope it was a girl searching to see if she could figure out his type in hopes of getting an idea of his likes before stalking him.

That's just a quick look at some of the searches that got people to our site, and a deeper look into the readers we have here. And yes I know I promised you my favorites of the last 6 months...

"jdroth nickelodeon" (I'm like 90% sure I know the guy who put this in)
"little nude sweethearts" (hopefully not cross linked with Perverted Justice)
"Betty White if she had a dick" (but don't we all wonder that from time to time)

See you next month. Keep those searches coming!


Anonymous said...

a) all these questions about the "popcorn trick" should lead to a nice write up on teh movie 'Diner'.
b) I was not the JD Roth searcher

Goose said...

Are you certain it wasn't you? I won't judge.

Anonymous said...

i'm pretty sure GDR was the author of #2 though on your list... said...

The chap is definitely just, and there is no doubt.